Calling Tomatoplantproject!

[TwoKettles]

Anyone seen anything from her? She had a couple of very busy threads a short time ago but all has gone quiet. I did post a few times on your past threads but have NC since the hacking thing. Tomato, if you pick this up, I hope you and DD had a good Christmas and New Year, and that 2016 gives you all you hope for!

[Joysmum]

Me too

[sadwidow28]

Yes - I also wish you and DD a joyous and happy 2016.

[tomatoplantproject]

Hello!

I'm here and thank you for thinking of me.

We have survived Christmas and New Year and I managed to do the Santa thing with a little girl who was shaking with excitement and who got everything she asked for (only a Let it Go dress and a small toy giraffe so pretty easy to please).

Everyone now knows and I have been overwhelmed by the kindness and support from every area, especially my lovely cousins.

Some of my closest friends came to mine for NYE - I was absolutely dreading it and yet we were crying with laughter and other than a "Fuck You ..." he wasn't mentioned at all.

He has been irritating me beyond belief with low level fuckwittery. He has taken some stuff from the house without permission which I only noticed on NYE, and he keeps trying to change his access dates for dd. It has become incredibly obvious that when he has dd she isn't a priority (eg taking her on long car trips unnecessarily).

He is still in my head. I still obsess over how he could do what he has done and how I just didn't see any of this coming. And my poor mum is stuck obsessing over the same too.

I received the divorce papers today for signing and returning and they then get lodged with the court (I think). He isn't contesting the divorce but has hired the most ridiculously expensive lawyer. We start the financial mediation in the next few weeks. I am nervous because its so important I get it right.

I have a permanent knot in my chest which isn't loosening whatever I do.

[TwoKettles]

Hello Tomato - I'm so glad you are here and ok! EXDH was bound to try to keep some kind of control but I think you will outwit him. I'm interested to know how you decorated your Christmas tree - was it all colour-co-ordinated and grown-up with polished concrete ornaments, or did it have tinsel and things made by your DD?

[tomatoplantproject]

I bought a really little tree and we decorated it together. She wanted to do all the little baubles so they went on up to a certain height and I did the bigger ones higher up. She learned that baubles break when you drop them and so you have to be super careful.

Apparently daddy's tree was much bigger. It would have to be eh?

[sadwidow28]

Well I didn't even bother with a Christmas tree this year - but I did some fairy lights on my decking. Does that count?

I couldn't even be bothered to put up my ready-to-plug-in-light-up 2 feet Christmas tree with all the baubles that I lovingly wired on when DB lived with me. It was our holiday home tree for the window. I think I am becoming a grumpy old goat before my time!

I am so glad that you got through Christmas. I struggle every year as my wedding anniversary is 21st December and, even 14 years after losing him, I miss him. But life goes on - it is just different life and we learn our new normal.

Well, my DDog is still with me even though I had to start a thread in the pet place when I thought he would have to be pts. So to have him still with me is a bonus! And huge thanks to the MNetters in the pet place who still support me. DDog is time-limited and I know I have will have to grieve again in 2016.

We are doing our tomato plant project together - but DDog is more interested in eating the soil and seedlings! This is not part of the plan. Can you look through your roooool book for dogs helping in a tomato plant project and tell me what I do at this stage?

Take care and KOKO x

[doceodocere]

Hello Tomato, hope you're managing January, it sounds like you dealt brilliantly with Christmas. What a twunt you ex is! Hang in there.