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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

Ow... Well kind of.....

87 replies

Kimberley00001 · 30/12/2015 19:50

It's nearly new year and I'm feeling really down .. I know it's not an unusual problem but as it says in the title I've been kind of the ow on and off for 3 years although we only slept together this year, and he lied to me about the gf I had an idea but of course he lied through his teeth about her , said she was a family friend ! he's had 4 gfs since I've known him 4/5 years, since he split from his wife. I just can't get over him or forget him... Yes it's a cliche he's 50 and good looking , not short of offers, I'm early 30s we have amazing sex a few times a year and in short I just want him so much. I'm realistic I know it won't go any where but all I want to do is pick up the phone wish him happy new year...the other half of me is so angry and hates him with a vengeance and what's to find the gf and tell her exactly who he is and the fact he's cheated before me, think long term affair while married etc. I've tried online dating meeting people through friends and other ways with nil success. I'm Very pretty but it doesn't matter an iota when it comes to relationships as I've found out. All my friends are coupled up and I recently broke friends with by best friend so I don't feel I have any one to turn to.my only relationship was an emotional abuse one again with someone older so I'm not worldly wise on relationships. Please help

OP posts:

Report

maeggee · 30/12/2015 20:06

Honey you know what ? Call it love ,infatuation or lust , you want the man you need the man there is nothing wrong about feeling on fire for a man you cannot have 24/7.Trust me beauty , money have nothing to do with needs of the heart .better be happy 4 times a month than be in a lifeless steady , faithful relationship like society would want to. That's my take everyone is free to feel otherwise.Make the most of things that make you happy hon.

SagaNorensLeatherTrousers · 30/12/2015 20:08

FellOutOfBedTwice · 30/12/2015 20:10

Fuck that advice! Cut all contact with this Knobhead is my advice.

AnyFucker · 30/12/2015 20:10

another one ?

Louisa111 · 30/12/2015 20:14

Cut all contact, he's never gonna be just yours and even if one day he wanted to make a go of it full time could you ever trust him....I know I couldn't.
Your wasting the best years of your life with him... Don't look back when your in your mid forties, possibly childless and wonder where it all went wrong..find someone better

TheCrazyDuchess · 30/12/2015 20:20

All the OW are out to purge themselves apparently...

Enoughalreadyyou · 30/12/2015 20:22

If he wanted you he would be with you. Every time he has chosen to be with someone else. Your a meaningless fuck dear.

Jibberjabberjooo · 30/12/2015 20:25

He doesn't want to be with you, you're just someone to shag very now and again.

Kimberley00001 · 30/12/2015 20:26

Ok now I'm really angry again .... I'm literally dying to text him a shit load of abuse .. Why does he walk away from this with out a scratch???!!!!

OP posts:

DrGoogleWillSeeYouNow · 30/12/2015 20:27

3 years, 1 ex wife and 4 girlfriends? Plenty of opportunity then, but he has never actually chosen a relationship with you.

My advice is... When you behave like you're happy to be nothing more than a convenient hole for a man to stick his dick into when he's bored of his wife/girlfriend, don't be surprised or upset or vengeful when he treats you like exactly that.

Kimberley00001 · 30/12/2015 20:28

And he's into pornography massively, see my other threads ...hours of piv and the most bizarre oral technique ever!!!!!!!

OP posts:

flamingnoravera · 30/12/2015 20:30

TheCrazyDuchess · 30/12/2015 20:31

Took my words flaming

Kimberley00001 · 30/12/2015 20:32

Why the biscuit flamingnora?

OP posts:

magoria · 30/12/2015 20:33

You're not kind of the ow. Unfortunately you are the ow.

You can now, in the full knowledge chose not to be any longer.

Oh and get STI tests as condoms don't protect and you now know he lies about his sexual activities. His girlfriend deserves to know she is at risk too.

Jibberjabberjooo · 30/12/2015 20:34

But there's no point being angry because he won't care. You won't be the only person he's shagging.

Kimberley00001 · 30/12/2015 20:34

Magoria, we never used any protection. I will get tested ASAP

OP posts:

Jibberjabberjooo · 30/12/2015 20:36

You never used any protection? Were you trying to get pregnant? Get an STI check ASAP.

Kimberley00001 · 30/12/2015 20:37

He couldn't finish so I used my hand he didn't cum inside me , yes I was stupid to trust him

OP posts:

TrojanWhore · 30/12/2015 20:38

Yes, I've just had a look at some of your earlier posts.

It's unsurprising, to me at least, that this man did not see you as anything other than NSA fun when you were living with a man you describe as in his early 40s. What happened to him?

spudlike1 · 30/12/2015 20:38

x 2

Kimberley00001 · 30/12/2015 20:39

I forced him to leave Trojan, that relationship was toxic.

OP posts:

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hefzi · 30/12/2015 20:43

You do know that a) a man doesn't necessarily have to ejaculate inside you for you to get pregnant and b) you can still catch STIs either way? If you didn't, you do now. You might be very pretty, but you're clearly not very smart

Kimberley00001 · 30/12/2015 20:46

Yes I know that hefzi... I don't think I can get pregnant but that's another story.. I will get tested

OP posts:

TheCrazyDuchess · 30/12/2015 20:51

You might be very pretty, but you're clearly not very smart.

^^THIS

Flip

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