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If your dp thought you wouldn't find out..

(211 Posts)
Followyourart Wed 30-Dec-15 09:23:50

Do you think they would sleep with someone else, if they had the opportunity and we're sure you wouldn't find out?
Because I think that mine would, and I'm not sure what that days about my relationship....

pocketsaviour Wed 30-Dec-15 09:26:02

I firmly believe the majority of men will take an opportunity to play away if they feel confident they won't get found out.

Arfarfanarf Wed 30-Dec-15 09:27:50

I dont know. Perhaps.
We'd all like to think our partner never ever would but I'd never put that amount of blind faith in anybody.

ALaughAMinute Wed 30-Dec-15 09:28:40

What Pocket said. Sad but true.

MrsH1989 Wed 30-Dec-15 09:30:07

Even if my DH was sure he would never get found out I dont think he would. He is very against one night stands and would struggle to hide an affair as I know all his passwords. IF he changed them and wouldnt tell me what they were then I would be onto him.

museumum Wed 30-Dec-15 09:31:50

I doubt it. He's not very sexually confident and also doesn't have the highest sex drive.
He's always been very self-deprecating about not being good at pulling women when he was single.

Costacoffeeplease Wed 30-Dec-15 09:32:20

I don't think mine would - I'm not being naive, I'm sure a lot of men would, but I don't think he's one of them

honeysucklejasmine Wed 30-Dec-15 09:32:55

Not a chance.

And I'd be mightily offended if someone suggested I would be disloyal simply because I had a penis. If someone is happy to cheat, its because they are an arsehole, not because they are a man.

3sugarsplease Wed 30-Dec-15 09:33:36

I'm pretty sure my partner wouldn't. He doesn't believe in casual sex and certainly not playing away.

He cuts people out of his life for this kind of behaviour. He has very strong morals - and I love that about him.

Takeparacetamolandstopmoaning Wed 30-Dec-15 09:35:19

It depends. I don't think so, yet I have plenty of male friends who would/ do and their wives would
swear blind they wouldn't. So I suppose DH could be similar to them

SevenSeconds Wed 30-Dec-15 09:35:27

Of course you can never be completely sure, but I'm pretty confident that DH wouldn't have an affair with another woman.

However, I guess he might (probably would?) have a one night stand or two if he was guaranteed not to get found out. That would bother me far less than an affair - if it was just about sex with no emotional involvement. We've been together for 18 years, so our sex life is comfortable rather than thrilling.

AyeAmarok Wed 30-Dec-15 09:35:56

I think many men would. But not all. I'd guess about half. Actually, more than half as half actually do, maybe 70% would if the opportunity presented itself.

I don't think mine would.

LBOCS2 Wed 30-Dec-15 09:38:16

No, I don't think he would.

For him, infidelity is an absolute deal breaker. He judges people very harshly for it and on it, and is absolutely black and white with sticking to his own moral viewpoint.

twinkletoedelephant Wed 30-Dec-15 09:45:18

I am pretty sure dh would ...and at some point will.

He tried when the babies were tiny.... She turned him down I stayed with him after i found out (looked at his phone for a genuine reason and saw text messages)

Our relationship has never been the same I will never trust him again. He carries on as normal. He believes we are fine.

With 2 prob 3 kids with problems its unlikely anyone else would want me, so I feel like I am waiting for the day I will become a single parent with 3 disabled dcs while he becomes the Disney dad he always wanted. With all the freedom of the week and eow contact...

BifsWif Wed 30-Dec-15 09:48:08

Your post made me feel really sad twinkle. You deserve more than that flowers

I'd like to think my DH wouldn't, but can anyone really be sure?

I'd be interested to see what we would all do if the question were reversed. I wouldn't cheat, I don't have the energy or the inclination!

jellyjiggles Wed 30-Dec-15 09:53:11

I think anybody is capable of anything given the right set of circumstances. I don't think my DH has but I can't be 100% sure. He's not very sexually driven and I imagine he'd feel terrible afterwards.

I would have done years ago but not now. It's just not worth it!

AlanPacino Wed 30-Dec-15 09:54:08

I don't think mine would. He's very transparent and open so I think he knows it would screw with his head too much.

Lndnmummy Wed 30-Dec-15 09:55:40

You never know but I would be surprised. An emotional thing, yes I do think so at times he might have done or do this (which to me is bad enough should I find out) but something sexual I do not think so.

AlanPacino Wed 30-Dec-15 09:57:19

I just asked him and he said no, he 'wouldn't want anyone in that intimate space' he shares with me.

TimeToMuskUp Wed 30-Dec-15 09:58:57

I'd like to think not; he's very honest and very loyal. But you can't know for certain, can you?

In the reverse situation I can guarantee that I wouldn't. I'm just not a ONS/affair sort, and can't be arsed shaving my legs for DH let alone for a stranger.

Branleuse Wed 30-Dec-15 09:59:37

No I dont think he would. Hes had opportunities, and he had opportunities in his ex marriage too and never took it

ChristmasHousewife Wed 30-Dec-15 10:00:46

I really don't think mine would. He's a terrible liar so he'd know I would find out and would just end it then sleep with them.

Having said that, I'm quite sure that he doesn't want to at all currently, he's very happy with me and our marriage. Doesn't mean I'm complacent about the possibility of things changing though, we're still relatively early days at late 20s/early 30s.

Pidapie Wed 30-Dec-15 10:03:46

I definitely think mine would not do it.

Firsteverchangeofname Wed 30-Dec-15 10:05:33

Yes I think possibly,

I think the job I'm in has shown me over the years much goes on, One minute the guys are producing pics of their wife and family over a group dinner.

Next night pissed and waking up in someone else's bed.

Quite a few 'perfect husband' shockers over the years.

scarednoob Wed 30-Dec-15 10:05:45

I'm v confident mine never would. He's had it done to him in the past and hated it.

However of course he has other things that drive me mad (gets wound up over things like needing to sell his house that he should just get on with instead of stewing over it for two sodding years whilst the sodding thing sits empty, grrrr) and I've been out with guys previously that were much more perfect in those regards. But I would have said most of those might well have done (in fact 1 did, regularly). So I value his honesty and fidelity v highly!

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