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Anyone else done The Marriage Course - how do you make time for marriage time with young kids

(2 Posts)
ridingsixwhitehorses Tue 29-Dec-15 23:58:49

We have three under five. When we did the marriage course we only had two and paid for a babysitter sometimes or my parents did a few hours weekend daytime so we could do stuff.
Now there are three it's too much for my parents to handle having all at once and the baby is too little to leave with a stranger. But over Christmas we had two 'dates' - we went to a sports event and also out for lunch, and wow do we feel happier for it. Had hardly any time together recently as new baby is demanding in the evenings and dh has demanding job with lots of evening work and ill parents he has to go and see when he can. But we've been reminded by our dates of the marriage time thing.

Any suggestions?

Anyone who doesn't know what I am on about here is an article about it:

http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2013/dec/28/mission-to-save-marriages

FATEdestiny Wed 30-Dec-15 00:19:36

Our children are currently 11, 10, 6 and 1. Much easier now the bigger ones are older, but I do remember the time when I had a house full of toddlers.

We haven't done any marriage course but I do consider our marriage to be strong.

What keeps us sane is our evenings, when the children are asleep and we can have time to just be Mr&Mrs rather than Mum&Dad. Aside from a few months with a newborn, we get that every evening so its a daily check-in on our marriage.

Date Nights are not our thing. Our parents are great and do offer to babysit but honestly we'd both prefer a relax at home and sleep more than anything else. We therefore usually take babysitting opportunities in the daytime and go for lunch.

The concept of being "child free" changes as you have a big family too. Our youngest is still a baby and I am not happy for her to be babysat yet. But it is still a treat for me and DH when someone offers to have the Bigger 3 for a couple of hours and so DH & I can do something special with only the baby with us - a lot easier than trapsing 4 children along with you.

Much will get easier for you once your older children start school. I can get a lot done during the school day now with just baby at home. Then it is lovely when DH has a day off during term time. Baby is still with us, but certainly less chaotic and busy just with one child.

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