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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

How long was it before you could really laugh with your DP?

21 replies

Maminska · 29/12/2015 17:02

Was it instant (first couple of dates) or did it develop over time? and if they're shy, did that mean they opened up later on?

OP posts:

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AliciaMayEmory · 29/12/2015 17:04

First date for us. In fact, first meeting.

handslikecowstits · 29/12/2015 17:05

As soon as we met. His sense of humour was what attracted me to him in the first place.

Maminska · 29/12/2015 17:07

Ah shit. I've met someone I like, but still not sure if we have the same sense of humour... I suspect he is pretty funny but I can't just really laugh with him, which I want to :( Write off or carry on? Sense of humour is non-negotiable for me, I'm not sure if it's one of those things that comes with time?

OP posts:

Atomik · 29/12/2015 17:08

Six months. Took that long for me to learn enough of his language for us to actually converse, let alone understand each others' sense of humour.

We've made up for it over the years. He can bring me to my knees with laughter.

DontKillMyVibe · 29/12/2015 17:11

2nd date. No awkward silences on first date but felt totally comfortable and at ease from 2nd date onwards.

Also got v tipsy on 2nd date and ended up in a cheesy 80s disco which was impossible not to laugh at

DontKillMyVibe · 29/12/2015 17:15

.... The boyfriend before that did make me laugh but I always felt a bit awkward around him and never really myself iykwim despite thinking at the time that I was infatuated!

CiaoMane · 29/12/2015 17:16

My DH made me laugh from the word go.

To be brutally honest, if I couldn't or didn't laugh with a guy within a couple of dates, it would be a no go-fer for me.

HooseRice · 29/12/2015 17:17

Day 1

Still makes me laugh and vice versa 20 odd years down the line.

catfacesunday · 29/12/2015 17:18

Within minutes.

Maminska · 29/12/2015 17:26

Damn. We have only met twice, have had a laugh but are both a bit shy round each other still I think? No one have any miracle stories about how they suddenly "got" each other? I feel like we prob do find the same things funny (both like the same comedy shows for eg, both have quite dry humour) but still on best behaviour...

OP posts:

Paperblank · 29/12/2015 20:00

Instantly. We are incredibly similar and still make each other roar with laughter.

We were friends for a couple of years before getting together but we made each other laugh as friends too.

Groovee · 29/12/2015 20:01

First date for us. We realised we'd been set up and couldn't stop laughing

mamapoppins23 · 30/12/2015 06:59

The first time we met ☺️

ArthurMcAffertyhastwocats · 30/12/2015 08:17

If you like him, give him a little while longer. I remember laughing on my first couple of dates with DP but it was mostly a different sort of connection. The real laughing came later, when we really got to know each other. Our (shared) sense of humour tends to the absurd and ridiculous, and it's not the sort of thing you'd roll out on the first couple of dates. I now regularly cry with laughter when we are together but I didn't necessarily think that would be the case at the start.

Yoksha · 30/12/2015 09:58

Maminska, hi. Why is a sense of humour non-negotiable? We've been married nearly 41yrs. I've never got his humour! My 2Dd's have same sense of humour as him, and it drives me barking at times. But he does reduce me to tears occasionally. Yes hard times are made easier with humour, but life/love/relationships change and evolve as we as individuals do. He's actually a more rounded out/healthier human than me. Give him some time please.

BertieBotts · 30/12/2015 10:17

From the start here, too.

It's important to me. I'm glad we have it.

Being shy might be a factor though- DH and I were friends before we got together. Try watching some comedy you like together or go on a date to a funny film?

Barmaid101 · 30/12/2015 12:20

From the start here too

PurpleWithaMysteryBun · 30/12/2015 12:32

If you think your still a bit shy around each other give it some more time. If this is the only concern I would definitely give it a couple more dates to see if it is a slow burner.

OnADarkDesertHighway · 30/12/2015 12:43

Knew DP for years before we got together but the shared humour was there long before we started seeing each other and was one of the reasons we clicked.

I would not give up so soon OP as it can take a while to feel comfortable and show your character. It comes over as you having a similar sense of humour if you like the same comedies so possibly shyness and not relaxed enough.

ThisIsStillFolkGirl · 30/12/2015 15:04

It's a non negotiable for me too. Without the ability to make each other laugh, I would assume that we weren't suited fundamentally.

prettywhiteguitar · 30/12/2015 15:06

ahh give him a chance I think if you like him that's lovely, things aren't instant

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