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Relationships

Why do men get so angry when they've drank alcohol?

77 replies

Madandsad15 · 23/12/2015 18:29

My boyfriend after he drinks turns nasty(verbally) says he hates me and doesn't love me and hasn't for a while/only with me for the kids when he has had a drink.
Yet when he drinks with his friends he is just happy drunk and the life and soul.

Why do men do this?
What makes the nastiness start?

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AuntieStella · 23/12/2015 18:31

Some people (both sexes) are nasty drunks.

But it doesn't sound as if your BF is one of them. After all, he's fine except towards you.

That is a huge red flag.

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Owllady · 23/12/2015 18:31

Not all men get nasty, just like all women dont after a drink. I'd suggest if he is upsetting you and being aggressive you ask him to fuck off and grow up

are you ok?

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rockabillyruby82 · 23/12/2015 18:32

You can't generalise, your dp does that, some do but not all.
The question you need to ask is why does he behave like that with you?

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Madandsad15 · 23/12/2015 18:33

I'm fine yeah I just wonder why it's me he is nasty too.
I worry he really feels that way and the alcohol makes him speak the truth.

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EvaBING · 23/12/2015 18:33

Have one here beside me too. Waiting for the first slap.
Merry fucking Christmas you stalking sulking abusive cunt.

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Marchate · 23/12/2015 18:33

Sadly, the nastiness will be there all the time. The alcohol gives them an 'excuse' to express it.

Proof of this is that he's 'happy drunk' with his friends. He keeps the nastiness for you.

Someone please provide chapter/page from Why Does He Do That?

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EvaBING · 23/12/2015 18:34

Mine is a coward and I'm easier to slap than a man.

Fucking sick of it.

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Wolfiefan · 23/12/2015 18:34

If a person gets nasty when drinking then they need to drink MUCH less or not at all. Or move out.

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Madandsad15 · 23/12/2015 18:35

When we met 6 years ago he was fun with me drunk.
He was more touchy feely more emotional telling me about feelings etc.
Now it's just "hate you" "you've ruined my life" blah blah.

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Madandsad15 · 23/12/2015 18:36

I'm so sorry Eva :-(
Hope your okay.
My bf is never violent just with words.

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Wolfiefan · 23/12/2015 18:36

How often does he get drunk?

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coffeeisnectar · 23/12/2015 18:36

No one should put up with abuse from anyone, male or female, drunk or sober.

Women's aid can help you leave.

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Madandsad15 · 23/12/2015 18:37

Every weekend.

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Madandsad15 · 23/12/2015 18:38

He is fine sober.
Doesn't really speak to me much but isn't nasty.
When he has had a drink he usually stays with his mate.
Any excuse not to come home I reckon.

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Wolfiefan · 23/12/2015 18:39

Sounds like he has a problem with alcohol. You don't have to put up with verbal or physical abuse. Time to cut your losses?

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rockabillyruby82 · 23/12/2015 18:39

What is he like sober?

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Owllady · 23/12/2015 18:40

Eva? :( you need to report him
log it all

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bumblebeerat · 23/12/2015 18:41

I think both men and women can get aggressive with drink I know it's a reason I don't drink as I would get angry at everything. It wasn't directed at one particular person just anyone/thing.

He seems to be only aiming it at you and you deserve better than that.

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goodnightdarthvader1 · 23/12/2015 18:41

Doesn't really speak to me much but isn't nasty.

WHY ARE YOU WITH THIS LOSER???????

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rockabillyruby82 · 23/12/2015 18:41

Ok, so when he's sober he doesn't converse with you and when he's drunk he's abusive.
Any other problems in your relationship?
At the mo it sounds like he doesn't really love or want to be with you.

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Madandsad15 · 23/12/2015 18:42

The drinking only started like this since we moved in together.
He is ok sober.
Just unhappy and snappy.
Never smiles.
Maybe he ain't happy.
I don't know.

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SmallLegsOrSmallEggs · 23/12/2015 18:42

It's not the alcohol. It's him. Sounds like an ulitmatum might be in order.

eva you can leave. It isn't easy but it can be done. Life is too short. Cobtact WA and/or the police if he hits you.

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leaningtoweroflego · 23/12/2015 18:43

My DP gets silly and happy when he's drunk, he's good fun to be around.

ExP got angry when he was drunk. It got worse the longer we were together, hence he is now the ex.

You do not need to put up with this. Please don't let him use the booze as an excuse. He is being nasty to you. If he can't be nice to you he should not drink. If he's not willing to stop drinking then he is saying he is going to carry on doing this to you. If he wok't stop, you need to protect yourself and take you me self away from him.

LTB, please xxx

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Madandsad15 · 23/12/2015 18:44

He doesn't like his job.
Lack of sleep as we have a 8 month old.
He said he is bored.
Not sure if that's life or me or just in general.

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leaningtoweroflego · 23/12/2015 18:44

*yourself, not you me self!

This phone has a mind of its own!

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