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Relationships

I think we just broke up, a week before Christmas

3 replies

BlueBananas · 16/12/2015 23:25

Is this the worst timed break up ever?! We have 3 DC (well DC3 is only 6 weeks so he doesn't count) but will this scar the other 2? Will this always be the Christmas that the baby came and Daddy left?

I should have powered through until after Christmas I know, but I just can't physically do it anymore, I just don't have anything left

But now I feel like shit for them
It's just such bad timing
I hope they don't hate me

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Redhotknickers · 16/12/2015 23:44

You had to do it, you had to do it. Don't beat yourself up. I've been there. Timing's unfortunate but can't be helped. Eventually you will come through this & your life will be so much better for it. Sending you hugs. {}

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BlueBananas · 17/12/2015 00:09

Thanks RedHotKnickers
I know that Christmas will be a lot better without him here tbh, and I suppose now is a good time for me as I'll be busy and there will be lots of people around for a while
Just a lot bit shit isn't it
And I can't even self medicate with wine because of the baby

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Offred · 17/12/2015 00:43

There is never a good time to break up.

The kids will be sad, angry and stressed. They may throw the Christmas thing in your face and other things too over time.

None of that matters, they have to go through a process of accepting the change which involves their rudimentary emotional expressions - usually sad, angry, clingy, manipulative (playing you off against each other/trying to get you back together). All of it is normal and not a sign you have made a wrong choice.

You are the parents. This is not a decision the kids get to or should make and as long as you are making the right choice about your relationship for you they have to and will learn to accept it! Don't forget by splitting they will never know how unhappy things would have been if you stayed together so obviously they are going to want it to have not happened - they just lack the reasoning and understanding of the situation that the adults do.

Just support them, let them get their feelings out. Try and make a new happy life and eventually it will be fine!

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