Talk

Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

STBXP just called me a dumb fuck

(17 Posts)
DiorSausage Sun 13-Dec-15 19:40:54

in earshot of the DC.

Because he can't cope with actually having to be a parent for more than 5 minutes before getting cross and acting like a petulant manchild.

He has found a place to move to and is moving out first week after Christmas. I have been wobbling to and fro for the last few weeks worrying it was the wrong decision and fearing that we would be messing up our DCs childhoods but how the hell can us living apart be worse than us being together, being mostly fine and then him slamming doors and calling their mother names in front of them? It just can't.

Roll on 2016. Someone pass the wine

DiorSausage Sun 13-Dec-15 20:46:47

I've started without you all wine

slicedfinger Sun 13-Dec-15 20:47:41

wine

wine right back atcha.

And I still wish there was a [gin] icon...

Anniegetyourgun Sun 13-Dec-15 21:07:53

I suppose wine is shorthand for "alcoholic beverage of your choice", just as [tea] contains whatever you fancy in the hot drink line.

Anyway, yes, STBXP has done you a favour by demonstrating why splitting up is the right thing to do. Here's to a peaceful New Year wine

Anniegetyourgun Sun 13-Dec-15 21:08:25

argh brew - you can tell I haven't used that one in a while.

RandomMess Sun 13-Dec-15 21:10:41

Have some cake too tomorrow x

IamlovedbyG Sun 13-Dec-15 22:51:13

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

DiorSausage Sun 13-Dec-15 23:05:17

Thanks everyone.

I had my glass of wine and it was delicious. I have exams this week so have lots to distract me.

I'm just sick of him being so deeply unpleasant. And to do it in front of the kids is unforgiveable.

DoreenLethal Sun 13-Dec-15 23:11:24

You cant be that dumb, you are getting rid of this waste of space.

Cheers OP.

TaliZorahVasNormandy Sun 13-Dec-15 23:17:59

3 week to go OP. Just think, 3 weeks to go.

Cheers wine

ImtheChristmasCarcass Sun 13-Dec-15 23:45:00

🍸 🍹 🍷🍺

I've got a whole bar. Drink up everyone!

OP, time will fly and he'll be gone before you know it!

Oooh! Well jell at Carcass' drinkies!

DiorSausage Mon 14-Dec-15 14:24:00

Can I please have three dry and dirty martinis Carcass? With olives grin

He, as usual, muttered a solitary "Sorry" at me and then acted like nothing was wrong. This morning he brought me tea. In the past (and there have been numerous other similar events) I've ended up minimising what's happened and getting back to a version of normal. A version where each time I end up with a bit less love and respect for him. Sod that.

I'm very worried about money, I'm not working at the minute. I don't know if I'd be entitled to any benefits. This is all new territory for me. I did just cancel three unnecessary direct debits saving myself £45 a month. That's a good start.

hellsbellsmelons Mon 14-Dec-15 14:31:35

Have a look at entitledto.co.uk
Have you spoken to a solicitor?
CAB can help you as well.
Once he has gone you will get a reduction in council tax so get that in motion.
Look at every bill and see where you can cut things.
When my Ex left I had to manage entirely on my own.
I reduced bills and insurances etc... by loads.

ImtheChristmasCarcass Mon 14-Dec-15 15:18:07

Dior 🍸🍸🍸

Finances first, income & expenses, savings & housing costs. Then see a solicitor with that information. Once you have the finances worked out the rest will fall into place. Especially if you think he'll be difficult about maintenance for the children.

It'll all work itself out. Perhaps not in the exact way you want or are planning. But it will work itself out and you'll have peace in your home at last.

ShebaShimmyShake Mon 14-Dec-15 16:10:37

You are doing the right thing. I wish I hadn't had to listen to my father calling my mother every name under the sun my entire childhood. I used to call children in the playground 'shitbrain', 'piece of shit' and 'stupid fucking cunt'. Why not? Dad called Mum those things and more and then told us it wasn't a big deal.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now