I've noticed that there seem to be a variation of responses about what happens to ex-husbands after separation.
I've read a few threads where there is clearly an unhappy marriage and the advice often given is to separate if very unhappy, both go on to live happier lives with other people and share childcare arrangements and try and co-parent as well as you can.
I've read many threads on here about ex-husbands being unfaithful and the response often given is LTB, see how he manages only seeing DC at weekends and he'll probably end up lonely, away from the family home and on his own.
Isn't it that there is a bigger picture and that if there is an unhappy marriage (whether that involves infidelity or not which is wrong and ideally problems should be tackled before it gets to that stage) that ideally the desired outcome should be the same that both parents should have a thriving life after a separation for the sake of the DC what ever happened?
I'm writing this as a single mother who left Ex-H after he had an affair whilst I was pregnant and I've raised my DS for 16 years very much alone but have forgiven, moved on, realised our marriage wouldn't work out after this and so only wanted the best for myself, my ex-h and ds. I have ended up with much less in life as a result (I was done out of a lot of money with no maintenance for the first 2 years), I had to move from a house to a flat, I had to leave my career which was not practical as a single parent etc but I don't see the need to hold that against ex-h for the rest of our lives and we get on well. He has remarried, has more dc and a lovely wife. I have a great life now too which I wouldn't have had we stayed together.
I just don't understand the variation in responses to what others think will happen to ex-h's depending on how the marriage ends.
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
What happens to Ex-husbands
2 replies
MenInBlack123 · 09/12/2015 20:56
OP posts:
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.