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Pregnant and annoyed! Can anyone relate?

(4 Posts)
13runette Sat 05-Dec-15 02:39:38

I'm seven months pregnant and have a two year old. This pregnancy has been tough for me in the sense that in the beginning I was really sick and the last couple of months I have felt very tired and exhausted. Some days are better than others but most days I feel totally wiped out. My bf (of 10 years) is home now yet I am still the one that needs to do all the cooking, grocery shopping, changing the diapers (occasionally he will change one once a week or so) bathing, laundry etc. Yet I can't count how many times he has called me lazy because I will take a nap during the day or when I feel really tired (and leave him with our son since he is at home) He has also called me lazy because I lie in bed when he is in the living room playing his video games and talking to his friends which I do because there is not enough space on our couch for me to sit comfortably and I'm much more comfortable in my bed than sitting anywhere else. He has always worked steadily and brought in more money then me and for this reason believes that I should be happy with that and not bother him to do anything and I should do it all which I find very frustrating at times. He has also told me that he has never heard of a woman being pregnant like me (complaining about being tired and napping or lying down so much). Some days are better then others but I can't help but feel down when he calls me lazy and tries to make me feel bad for resting especially because he is the one that really wanted this other baby in the first place. Can anyone relate?

bittapitta Sat 05-Dec-15 06:55:53

No I can't relate because my husband is not an arse or a man-child.

You are carrying his baby. Tell him to educate himself about pregnancy, it's not on for him to call you lazy.

Cinnamon2013 Sat 05-Dec-15 07:20:42

Hi 13runette. I can relate completely to how you are feeling pregnancy-wise. I'm also 7 months pregnant with a two year old, and I feel very tired, first trimester was floored with sickness. It's hard and I nap/rest at lunch when I get the chance and get early nights. I'm usually asleep on OH on the sofa by 9.

What I can't relate to is the additional stress (and it sounds significant) that is being put on you at this time by your ex being so unsupportive. His behaviour is out of line - it's not OK and you should not have to tolerate this.

He should not be calling you lazy, for starters.

I'll tell you a bit about how things are our house, not to say this is right (and less so to be smug) but instead to give you a comparison, so that hopefully you can see that what he's telling you isn't right.

OH makes space on the sofa. He cooks more than me. We split cleaning and looking after toddler 50/50 but if I'm knackered that day he does more and I lie down (guilt-free). Weekends he takes toddler out for at least two hours, when I rest. All pregnancies are different. My last one was fine - I did everything normally - but it's not his business to distrust or challenge me. If I say I'm too tired - I am.

How was your partner in your first pregnancy? How is he feeling about this one and the new baby coming? How is your relationship in general?

I feel quite annoyed on your behalf. He needs to grow up and support you.

PolarBearNecessity Sat 05-Dec-15 07:28:49

How would you feel if your child was being treated like this by their partner?

It's not good, OP. You deserve better.

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