So, I have a new-ish boyfriend and it's at the stage where we're occasionally staying the night at each other's houses, and sleep in the same bed.
We usually fall asleep snuggled up, which is lovely. However, we then stay like that and it's a bit of a problem... Basically, if I get too hot while I'm asleep I tend to have nightmares.
So, pretty much every time we've shared a bed I've had bad dreams - he's actually woken me up because I was whimpering and obviously unhappy. Other times I've jerked awake all panicky which has woken him (I think in some of the dreams I've felt trapped, which obviously doesn't help when I wake up and he's holding me so I can't move much...).
Do you think this might get better if we stay together more? If so I'll just put up with it for a bit longer, but I don't want to wake him up all the time and it's not much fun for me either! He's mentioned that he really loves sleepy cuddling though, so I feel bad saying anything. Especially as it seems a bit like I'm blaming him for my dreams!
Any bright ideas how to mention it in a nice way? Or should I hope I get used to it? It's never been a problem before, so I don't know what to do! I think I might try thinner pyjamas next time and see if that helps...
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Sleeping cuddled up is giving me nightmares. What can I do?
PolkadotsAndMoonbeams · 30/11/2015 01:19
You're both being woken when you fall asleep wrapped in his arms. Could you try moving apart when you're at the "just drifting off" stage? I found it comforting to still have some bodily contact, like my foot touching his leg, but it wasn't as overwhelming as full snuggles.
If he really wants/needs/likes sleepy cuddling, you could introduce a soft toy wearing your perfume, to be stuffed in the top of the bed. 
Or you could try having a cooler bedroom? Open windows (don't know how feasible this would be) or switch off central heating in that room.
This thread reminds me of a scene in Friends, I think it was Ross explaining the 'Hug and Roll'
Cuddle and Hug, gently roll away before falling asleep. My GF and i seem to sleep back to back most nights with just our bums touching.
I think it's nice and nothing to do with fat bums. 
Oh no, I don't think he'll take it badly - he's lovely.
It's just that this is the first time I've slept with somebody (late starter... so although technically we are both adults, in terms of experience I'm probably about 16!).
I'm enjoying it but I don't really know what I'm doing! I didn't really know whether it was normal to sleep cuddled together or not - the first time we shared a bed he pulled me towards him and curled up around me and we talked for a bit, then went to sleep, so I presume it's what he's done before.
Having said that, obviously it's no good if it's giving me nightmares, so I'll say something. My room is quite cool already, but his is usually warm. I'll mention it next time, but I like the idea of cuddling into his back, or just keeping a little bit connected - I'll definitely try that. Thank you
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