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Since leaving my dh a year ago and I honestly haven't have missed him, am I emotionally blunt?

(15 Posts)
Jessica888 Sun 22-Nov-15 16:27:09

I actually don't know whether this is a good thing or not (does it mean I'm emotionally blunted?).
I left my husband last year and although I have had many days of feeling sad that I am now single, worries about managing on my own etc, I realised that I haven't had one day when I've actually missed him as a person.
I've had some very lonely moments when I've wished someone else was around and wonder about the future (I'd love to meet someone more suitable in the future) but days go by when I don't even think about him.
I left because I knew I couldn't spend the rest of my life with him, there was no big attraction (even from the beginning) and we're just very different people in many ways. There were no big rows or a big fall out, I just decided I didn't want to spend the rest of my life with someone I felt mostly negatively about (for his sake and mine) and wanted more from a relationship if I ever had one in the future. He is now seeing someone else and actually I'm okay with that.
Are my emotions going to ever catch up with me or is it that we just really weren't right so I don't really have anything to miss?

Jessica888 Sun 22-Nov-15 16:27:48

Sorry, title should read haven't missed him!

HolgerDanske Sun 22-Nov-15 16:36:24

It's just that it wasn't ever really right, so there would be no reason for you to miss him.

Savagebeauty Sun 22-Nov-15 16:38:41

I don't miss mine either. Never think about him.

ALaughAMinute Sun 22-Nov-15 16:53:21

I doubt you will ever miss him as it doesn't sound like you were that into him in the first place.

BitchPeas Sun 22-Nov-15 16:56:07

I've never ever missed XH. It's been 6 and a half years.

TempusEedjit Sun 22-Nov-15 16:56:40

It just confirms you made the right decision rather than you being emotionally blunt.

category12 Sun 22-Nov-15 17:08:33

I haven't missed mine at all. Just happy. I think because it was the right thing for me and the relationship was broken.

TopOfTheCliff Sun 22-Nov-15 18:04:57

If you compare how you feel with someone who deeply loved their partner and has lost them through bereavement then obviously you won't be grieving in the same way. He is still alive and well, and you chose to end the relationship because it wasn't making you happy. You would expect some regret for the relationship you never had and the time you invested in him but actually I don't see why you shouldn't be quite glad to have got away and started your new life full of possibilities.

I left my XH five years ago and I occasionally feel a pang of sorrow at the loss of my happy little family unit, but most of the time I just love my new life.

ThisIsStillFolkGirl Sun 22-Nov-15 18:07:10

I don't miss my ex. Why would I? I don't want to be with him. It's why he's an ex.

LovelyFriend Sun 22-Nov-15 18:51:54

I don't miss my x either.
You left him for a reason. And you've moved on. It's a good thing smile

Jessica888 Sun 22-Nov-15 21:15:26

Thanks for your replies. To the outside world it was a perfect life and I guess that's what I thought I should miss but actually even the nice lifestyle I don't really miss. Glad you don't all think I'm in denial.

Isetan Mon 23-Nov-15 07:56:47

It sounds like you were indifferent about him from the beginning and got out before that turned to hate. Why does it surprise you that you don't miss him? Your feelings of indifference is confirmation you made the right decision and not that your emotionally blunt.

Joysmum Mon 23-Nov-15 08:03:28

Why are you thinking negatively about yourself on this?

All0vertheplace Mon 23-Nov-15 09:10:08

This all resonates with me. I feel about my DH roughly as you did about yours. Trouble is, we have kids, so it's really hard to consider separation.

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