The subject heading says a lot of it.
At the time I was 18 and was living/working in a city far away from where I'd been brought up. I went out with a colleague after work on a Friday and woke up in my own bed the next day around 2pm - I recollect that as I was very very late for my overtime shift on the Saturday. I have hazy recollection of the actual night. Partially due to it being a long time ago and partially because I was very drunk.
I think my colleague and I met some blokes, paired off. I took one back to my flat to get changed. (I can picture the blue checked dungarees I changed into) Nothing happened between us. Went to a night club with him. At some point we argued, I'm pretty sure I'd lent him money and he was refusing to give it back.
I was chucked out by the bouncers.
Hazy becomes clear at this one point. Bouncers would not listen to me. I'm on the street outside of the club and a car pulls up. Occupant asks if I'm ok and suggests I go with him. Which I did.
Hazy memory again. Only one memory is playing pool in this guy's house, it's like looking down on myself. I can see a translucent drink in my hand and me trying to keep the pool table between us. And then nothing for 12ish hours. No idea how I got back to the place I was living at the time. Nothing. But I did know I'd had sex. And I had 50 quid in my pocket.
I am almost certain it was not consensual. But obviously can't be 100% on that. At the time I buried it, totally. I was working in that city to go travelling, which I did for over a year and the incident didn't come to mind.
Roll on 16 years and I'm in bed with a newish bloke, someone I trust implicitly and have known for some time. Very drunk and, apparently mid sex stopped, rolled away and said "I'm not a victim". But would not say anymore.
So, it reared its ugly head in a way that made my bloke pretty weirded out, understandably.
I just don't know where to go from here. Sorry it's been long, just wanted to get all the facts, as I recall them, in.
Any ideas?
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I think I was raped 16 years ago
39 replies
chitofftheshovel · 14/11/2015 22:34
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