My husband and I at separating. We haven't really decided if it's a trial or not. We haven't been a proper couple for about two years, more like brother and sister. We have three children though. He is moving out to a shared flat on Monday. Part of me wants to say .. This is all a big mistake .. Another part wants to say we will get through this and life will be better for our kids without all the arguing.
I just know I will be devastated on Monday evening when the house is empty and the children are crying.
how do you get through the early stages?
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Advice for getting through this weekend.
21 replies
mrsrabbitsays · 14/11/2015 09:45
OP posts:
Bloodywellhowmuch ·
14/11/2015 10:11
My stbexh left 3 weeks ago to move back to his mothers and last weekend moved into a flat on his own. I coped by not being in the house when he packed his stuff up and left, I took the kids to the cinema and had an evening meal out with them. It helped that he moved out on a Saturday.
It was weird without him, and yes I've shamed myself begging him to come home, BUT on the evening he left, I had a glass of wine, cuddles from the kids and discussed how we all felt about the situation, asked if there was anything they wanted to do or change or any place they wanted to go. We made a list and are implementing the changes that were asked for.
It's not easy, but be easy on yourself, it's ok to cry and to cry in front of the kids, they will know you are hurting and may try to bottle their feelings so not to upset you more but by crying in front of them you are showing that it is ok to be upset.
Good luck 
mrsrabbitsays ·
15/11/2015 20:55
Blazing argument about debt. All the debts are in my name and he's transferred the dmp. Kids go to bed late . Tomorrow I won't be here so you better be nice to me now .. Etc. nearly buckled and told him to stay. Not going to be able to sleep . 
OP posts:
Bloodywellhowmuch ·
16/11/2015 08:07
What a total tosser, as if you have to be nice to him AT ALL. Keep yourself busy, keep out the house if you have to as long as you trust him to not take anything that isn't his. I might accidentally lose my house key this evening and have to change the locks and conveniently forget to give him a copy of the new one.
It took my stbexh 2 weeks to leave (because I was a doormat and allowed him time to gather all his things and find somewhere to go) and it was terrible, we would sit together in an evening for a few hours and talk over the same topic again and again - the day he left was a huge weight off my shoulders as well as an upset one.
Keep coming and sharing what you need to in order to get through the day and the coming weeks. because today isn't go to be easy
Bloodywellhowmuch ·
17/11/2015 06:57
Well you have done your first night with out him, you're still here the kids are and hopefully unlike me you still have your dignity intact and didn't rise to Facebook and answer back I posted a couple of P/A status' aimed at him and her
Take today as it comes and remember you are now 24 hrs into breaking the habit - the hardest bit is over as its happened xxxx
and take a few deep breaths to face today
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