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Abusive Dr - 'fuck off Keith!' update.

(24 Posts)
laughingatweather Thu 29-Oct-15 20:00:16

Hi everyone. Was posting under another NN at the time and had to have all my threads deleted for several reasons. Mainly due to investigations and speculation.

For those of you that remember....After a long, long and stressful road he was dismissed by our employer. Not that recently but wanted to wait till telling you all but I DID promise I'd update you.

There are other more serious investigations pending which I can't comment on but I doubt he'll ever work as a Dr again.

Please don't mention what I said on my previous threads as it would out me to anyone involved and please don't speculate on who 'Keith' (not his real name obviously!) may be. I don't want to have to ask for this thread to be deleted for the following reasons....

I received amazing support from MNetters who helped me to unravel the manipulation and abuse and see it for what it was. I knew it deep down but he was so clever and in such a revered position, he made me think it was all in my head. I want every poster on my threads to know how significant your advice was and how it gave me the confidence to do something.

Second reason - I want anyone out there who thinks someone is 'untouchable' and in such a powerful position they'll always get away with it and always have...

I thought all of those things and he told me that too. That he was too important, that I wouldn't be believed, that I was psychologically damaged etc.

It took all my courage to do what I did and I actually believed him. I thought it would be ignored, that it would end my career because I was disposable and he was a big 'name' but my concerns were so great I couldn't live with myself if I didn't speak out.

It was David against Goliath but I was listened to and believed and once people started looking into him ...It all unravelled.

Thank you to all of you for your support and advice. You all contributed to my actions and if I hadn't acted, God knows how long he'd have carried on.

daylily Thu 29-Oct-15 20:11:28

I remember your thread and story Laughing, I only lurked but wow you were very brave and I am very pleased that the nasty sod got found out. Well done.

FeckTheMagicDragon Thu 29-Oct-15 20:18:43

I remember your thread too, I'm so pleased that you got such an astounding result!!

AnotherCider Thu 29-Oct-15 20:22:15

I remember! Well done, so proud of you. That would have been a really difficult road to go down.

Lacoba66 Thu 29-Oct-15 20:27:01

I remember you as well. Blimey, you have been incredibly resilient and brave OP (not meant as condescending in anyway shape or form).

I hope that one day in the not to distant future, you can put all of his shite behind you and concentrate on the next episode of your life. star

BSites Thu 29-Oct-15 20:54:41

I remember you OP, and I salute you. That took a lot of guts.

Aussiebean Thu 29-Oct-15 20:54:43

Well done laughing. You should be very proud or yourself for many reasons.

I hope he rots wherever he is and doesn't pray on anyone else.

But not your concern. Onwards and upwards for you xxz

TopOfTheCliff Thu 29-Oct-15 21:02:47

Total respect to you OP. I remember your threads.
Your courage helped me get rid of a particularly nasty senior partner in my firm who used charm, manipulation and bullying to keep everybody where he wanted them. I thought of you and Keith and how the law applies to all of us however important. I stuck to my guns, wouldn't be charmed manipulated or bullied and result! Dr Smarm has left the building!!
So your thread, although long gone, has done more good than you can know.
Have a lovely life now it is over xx

AnotherStitchInTime Thu 29-Oct-15 21:07:10

Well done, I remember your threads. You have been amazingly strong and courageous. Good luck for whatever life brings you next. It will be so much brighter, if if it is not you will kick it's ass anyway!

laughingatweather Thu 29-Oct-15 21:11:06

Thanks everyone!. I do, at this stage feel a bit proud I did it. I have had amazing support from my employers but I do feel a bit annoyed that so many senior people have told me they always suspected X or Y but it took insignificant me to kick it all off and confirm people's suspicions 'officially'.

It's all been very 'locked down' in the trust I work for and I haven't gossiped at all and am still officially 'gagged' by my employers because of other external investigations and that's a correct approach as investigations shouldn't be open to corruption or contamination and I would never risk that - hence me asking posters not to speculate or mention the details on my previous threads (thank you btw!).

But not one person 'in the know' has said 'no way, he wouldn't do that, he's great' or whatever. Every single person in senior positions that I've had to relate often painful and humiliating incidents to has been professional and said nothing during the investigation but has told me now he's gone, that they believed me and always had a suspicion about. ....Lots of things.

A couple did try to do something but they weren't supported by the senior Consultant s. I guarantee all of those Consultants are scrabbling round now to distance themselves. ..

I guess none of that matters now because someone did it (me!) and it's all going to be out in the open shortly.

Thanks again all of you!.

TombStoneTessie Thu 29-Oct-15 21:15:10

Well done flowers

Lacoba66 Thu 29-Oct-15 21:21:07

laughing I remember a LOT of your previous thread, and remember how 'angst' you felt about reporting.

You sound like a different person wink. This is an 'episode' in your life that will fade- it's not who you are.

The best part is that you sound as though you now know this!!!

kittybiscuits Thu 29-Oct-15 21:28:36

I remember. Good for you. Hopefully you have saved a lot of further harm. wine

TheClacksAreDown Thu 29-Oct-15 21:38:11

I remember your previous threads. Well done you OP. Well done.

laughingatweather Thu 29-Oct-15 21:48:25

Topofthecliff - Thank you so much for your post. If just you read my thread and took courage then I'll be thrilled!. I hope others get courage too.

Laco - Thank you too. I AM a different person. I can't forget my first thread. It wasn't asking about his abuse or manipulation. I knew deep down that's what it was but my first thread was asking for help for me to retain some dignity in a 'fucked up' (read abusive but I couldn't name it) situation with a colleague.

And I vividly remember people telling me to report etc and me saying 'please don't ask me to go up against him, I'm no-one and he's 'someone' respected and important. He'll destroy me and my career'.

HE told me that when I challenged him and he believed it. I believed it too but had to report stuff.

It didn't happen - he tried but wasn't able to destroy me or my career. I can't say much about the last few months but it's been so, so stressful but the truth came out. And far more than even I suspected.

CakeUpWall Thu 29-Oct-15 22:10:07

Bloody well done laughing. I remember you well. What you did took such courage; moreover you've saved others from suffering what you went through. thanks

WorzelsCornyBrows Thu 29-Oct-15 22:29:30

I remember your previous threads. Well done for speaking up, I remember how terrified you were that you wouldn't be believed. I'm so glad he has been removed.

magnificatAnimaMea Fri 30-Oct-15 05:03:42

laughingatweather I remember your thread. I wondered at the time if I knew Keith. Good for you and very well done flowers

Anniegetyourgun Fri 30-Oct-15 05:23:54

I remember your threads. Excellent result. I do think the more people speak out the more often the right thing will be done, as in generations gone by such doings were not only covered up but not believed to be particularly important. Times are changing and cases like this are helping the change along. You were so scared, but you did it anyway; that is the very definition of courage.

pocketsaviour Fri 30-Oct-15 05:49:51

This is such good news. Well done you, it took a lot of courage to make your stand. star

winewolfhowls Fri 30-Oct-15 10:14:13

Wow you're brave and also inspirational. I love happy endings

AllThatGlistensIs Fri 30-Oct-15 10:42:42

Oh I remember your threads well!

Wow. You have been so brave, and you have been utterly vindicated. Well done you smile flowers

summerwinterton Fri 30-Oct-15 11:43:37

I am so impressed with you - well done indeed x

MotherOfFlagons Fri 30-Oct-15 11:52:26

Gosh! I remember your threads from before. What fantastic news and well done! You should be proud of yourself. flowers

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