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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

When you were 15 and were dumped....

25 replies

Wotsitsareafterme · 27/10/2015 21:21

What made you feel better?
Dn is very flat. I need ideas to help her move on

OP posts:

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sky1010 · 27/10/2015 21:22

My friends all came round to see me, with cake.

I got my hair restyled and some new clothes.

I started shagging seeing someone from work.

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spudlike1 · 27/10/2015 21:24

Like any heartbreak treat it like a bereavement take it very seriously , as seriously as you would any adult relationship breakdown / rejection.

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ImMeMe · 27/10/2015 21:30

I sang 'I will survive'. A lot. Loudly. Often with friends.

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BeetlebumShesAGun · 27/10/2015 21:31

I was 15 when my first "proper" boyfriend dumped me. My mum let me take to the sofa in pj's for pretty much a week, providing chocolate, hugs and Bridget Jones movie. She also invited my best friend over to talk sense into me and when I was feeling better, encouraged me to go out with my friends and have them over lots.

Generic but it really worked. Heartbreak is horrible, especially when you're a teen. Hope your DN feels better soon

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MisForMumNotMaid · 27/10/2015 21:37

Moving on is very difficult if you don't have the life experience to appreciate life does move on.

I most appreciated being taken seriously, my pain was real (okay the world didn't end, it was just a silly little teen relationship etc - with adult eyes I can appreciate), at the time it was everything.

Maybe help her focus on a girly night in and a few friend trips out, her special characteristics, rather than encouraging moving on. Time will help with that

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moopymoodle · 27/10/2015 21:38

Nothing. It felt like the end of the world and took a couple of years to pass. I laugh now but at the time I was heart broken!

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EskiDecaff · 27/10/2015 21:42

Shopping! New haircut, all very trivial but perfect. And yes agree with singing songs loudly, out of tune and selfies on bebo to see how many 'loves' I'd get that day whatever happened to bebo?!

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slugseatlettuce · 27/10/2015 21:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

drspouse · 27/10/2015 21:49

He turned up to a party he'd said he'd go to with me, with someone else. All my friends were hugely indignant and told me just what a b'stard he was. That helped loads.

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hilbil21 · 27/10/2015 21:51

Alcohol! Yes at 15! I had never drank till he cheated on me with one of my friends! All my friends had had their first encounter with alcohol while I was in the relationship and so they gave me my first taste of vodka when we split up! lol x

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Seeyounearertime · 27/10/2015 21:52

I blackened my heart and turned it stone and figured I'll never be hurt like that again so refused to let anyone close for a very long time. Now I'm a misanthropic, hateful, twisted bastard with an equally misanthropic, hateful and twisted bastard partner.

I got drunk.

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AnyFucker · 27/10/2015 21:54

I went and snogged another lad.

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RNBrie · 27/10/2015 21:55

My usually emotionless dad took me out for fish and chips and talked to me about how it wasn't me, that I was lovely and that is have to have lots of relationships that fail before I'd find someone just right for me. Was the highlight of our relationship at the time.

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ragged · 27/10/2015 21:57

DD whinged via Instagram at all their mutual friends (cheered her up no end).

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CarnivalBearSetFree · 27/10/2015 21:57

Keeping busy. At the time it was the end of the world. How could I ever get over the love of my life!? But I did. And now I laugh/cringe at the thought. As I'm sure everyone does.

Encourage her to get out with friends. Tell her it's okay to be sad. Tell her it won't last forever even if it feels like it will. Be silly, watch films, make her laugh.

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VocationalGoat · 27/10/2015 21:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

redleotard · 28/10/2015 03:35

time.

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ThisIsStillFolkGirl · 28/10/2015 07:53

This is a thing? Seriously? Getting overinvolved in your 15 yr old niece's love life?

I occupy a different world sometimes...

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WorzelsCornyBrows · 28/10/2015 08:38

I cried. Got my hair cut. Parents bought me chocolates and a CD I'd wanted for ages.

Then I called him every name under the sun.

I think it's sad when adults dismiss teen heartbreak. Yes it's almost inevitable that these relationships will end, that's not how it feels at the time and teens aren't equipped with the life experience to brush themselves off and move on in quite the same way we are. I remember the pain well.

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TeamScoutRifle · 28/10/2015 08:47

I have only been chucked once but it was horrible and I was 16 in the middle of my GCSE's and we had been together a year at least.
I didn't cry I just went straight out with my friends and got back on the horse with a man who had a motorbike good times.

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Wotsitsareafterme · 28/10/2015 09:39

Thanks everyone - the responses made me laugh and cry a bit. She's gone up the line to see her dad for a few days. I will plan something for when she gets back.
She binned the lovely but maybe a bit too nice boy and was thrilled when boy who looks like Justin bieber chased her and dated her )he was the dumper). Sadly a lesson she might have to learn many times over yet

OP posts:

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Destinysdaughter · 28/10/2015 09:48

My mum just shrugged and said 'plenty more fish in the sea' . Not helpful. He dumped me cos I wouldn't sleep with him ( at age 15 ). Called me a week later to say he'd take me back if I did. I was so desperate to keep him I agreed. However, I was too scared to go through with it and claimed to have my period. And got dumped again! Couldn't have told my parents as they would have been furious with me! Had to witness him snogging some blonde girl at the weekly disco, knowing he was having sex with her. Horrid feeling...

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NotEmptyNow · 28/10/2015 09:55

Destinysdaughter that's awful! I cried for a day then realised he was dick anyway and got over it. Funnily though I also found out a few months later that the reason he'd dumped me was because I was 'frigid'. He was 18, I was 15, teenage boys can be terrible.

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HotNatured · 28/10/2015 10:05

Nothing she can do. Just got to let time do it's job.

One of life's unavoidable lessons.

My first boyfriend dumped me because I wouldn't let him 'finger me' charming . He started going out with another girl the next day because she had already 'let someone cum on her hair at caravan club'. Classy times

I was so innocent back then, I couldn't think of anything worse than putting my tongue in a smelly boys mouth.

Made up for it since tho, and some

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Wotsitsareafterme · 28/10/2015 10:09

Posters who got dumped for not wanting to have sex/whatever yet - good for you and bullets dodged!!

We (her mum and I) don't think she has dtd - we think the dumping is because she doesn't live very local to the school where most of the kids live and had just moved even further - to an incredible house mind you that her friends will envy....but however