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Just realised that my friend has dumped me!

(5 Posts)
feesh Mon 26-Oct-15 20:17:26

I've got a friend that I'm really close to. We had twins at the same time and have been through thick and thin together since then. Our kids (now 3 years old) have grown up together.

Anyway, for the last week or so, she's been showing as online on WhatsApp but neither of my messages on there have shown as 'read' and she hasn't replied to them. I sent two - one was early last week just saying hi, havent seen you for ages, how's it going? and the 2nd was 'Have you guys gone on holiday yet?'

It never occurred to me that she was blanking me, but I was starting to get really worried that something had happened to her, maybe some kind of horrible shit that she was having to deal with like a death in the family or something equally awful.

It is quite out of character for her. I happened to be chatting to an acquaintance tonight on Facebook who happens to be a VERY good friend of my friend, so I asked her if anything was going on with my friend that meant she wasn't able to get in touch with me, because I was a bit worried about her.

She told me that this friend had dropped her like a hot stone 10 months ago and they hadn't spoken since - I was very shocked to hear this, as I know these two had had a very close friendship. It was a very similar pattern, ignoring messages and just completely stonewalling her for no apparent reason.

So now I guess I am a victim of the same M.O.

In some ways, I feel kind of good that it's clearly my friend with 'issues' and not me, if you see what I mean, but I am absolutely devastated to have been dumped like this for no reason at all, and I don't know what I am going to say to my kids, who absolutely adore her kids and ask about them all the time.

The only reason I can think of as to why she might be upset with me, is because I cancelled a breakfast date with her at the last minute a few weeks ago - because I'd been admitted to hospital the night before as an emergency case and was kept in for 3 days in the end. She went really off with me in her messages while I was in hospital and there was no offer of help or offer of visits or anything, which to be honest I was quite hurt by at the time.

But still. Wtf?! I'm really gutted.

So as not to drip feed, we are actually expats living in a small community, so people don't really tend to fall out here as it's such a small world (plus there is quite a strong sense of sisterhood anyway). None of it makes any sense. I feel like I have been dumped and it's the worst feeling.

Groovee Mon 26-Oct-15 20:32:51

I'd be gutted too. Hugs X

babettessupperclub Mon 26-Oct-15 20:36:21

I'd be upset about this but as hard as it is just leave her to it. She'll cut out all the friends In her life by the sounds of it- she was no help or support to you when you needed it, just remember that.

lougle Mon 26-Oct-15 20:52:15

It's only been a week. Try not to assume anything yet.

RandomMess Mon 26-Oct-15 20:57:05

Yes very hurtful to be on the receiving end. Any chance the friend is suffering from depression episode and just withdrawn for everyone seeing as she also dumped this other friend?

I just know when I'm depressed I completely withdraw from everyone, people are usually very shocked to discover that I even suffer from depression I internalise it all and then suddenly just go inwards.

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