I don't know how to handle this situation.
My sister is currently living with my mum (though she's soon to be moving away for a job), and I don't like the way she speaks to and treats my mum.
She's had a history of depression and fairy recently threatened suicide. The threats were to me and my mum. She's also pregnant, and, alone (which is scary enough, I know, but she's old enough to take responsibility for her actions). So my mum's scared to say anything when sister is rude to her.
I visited, spur of the moment, yesterday. I have a month old baby, and this was our first trip to visit my mum since the baby was born. Everything was going great - both mum and sister were loving the baby and cuddles etc.
Then my mum mentioned that she'd bought a lamp she needed help putting together. So sister says she'll help with that. I'm in the room, but breastfeeding so unable to offer any assistance whatsoever. Sister refused to read the instructions "I never bother!"
Of course, putting this bloody lamp together was quite tricky, and they really needed to have read the instructions... Sister managed to scratch the base of this lamp, which mum mentioned but sister didn't seem to acknowledge or care (she's cack-handedly forcing bits together with no care for the thing).
The thing that upset me so much was the way she spoke to mum - no respect for her. Both mum and I thought sister would "blow up" at various times - over a fucking lamp! We were both on eggshells, and I realised that I can leave. I don't have to stay in that situation, but mum does. She's so scared of "upsetting" sister and sister threatening suicide that she will put up with being spoken to like that.
How can I help my mum? Sister is not going to stay for long this time as she has a new job to go to, but they don't know about her pregnancy so I imagine she won't pass the probation period (she's around 21 weeks or so). If this happens she'll move back in with my mum and will rule over her like this, making my mum unhappy. I think she uses the suicide threats to control mum. But I'm too scared to test that theory. I don't know what to do for the best really.
I have serious reservations about how sister will cope with a baby. She told mum that she was moving back in with her to have the baby - didn't ask, told.
My mum is a fairly recent widow - dad died just over two years ago. So, mum's life has changed utterly and devastatingly, she needs to adjust to her new life, and was starting to by getting out more and being more social. But that will all change if sister moves back in and emotionally controls her.
I wish I knew what to do... any advice?
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Think my sister is emotionally abusing our mum
ARV1981 · 16/10/2015 08:12
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