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So frickin good yet so frickin bad

(4 Posts)
excitedbutscared Fri 14-Aug-15 20:59:00

I'm torn in this relationship

He's not the type I have been with before.

I've only had 2 serious relationships before and both have been with pretty normal, boring, 'steady' guys

This guy is different. He's fun, exciting and is everything that thrills me in a man, or person for that matter

When he told me he was completely in love with me about a year ago I was over the moon and shocked.. But deliriously happy.

Things are still great when we're together but he's very closed. I find it really hard to talk to him about deep stuff and although I know he loves me and is attracted to me, I don't really know where I stand long term

We don't live together and I feel like I make most of the effort to be together.. I've probably set that precedent myself and allowed him to be lazy

I love him and want it to work, but a lot of the time, I feel more sad and down than I do happy but am happier than ever when I'm with him

I don't want to make a big deal about it with him but don't know what to do. I don't know whether to just walk away and save the pain if I don't get the answer or result I want

I'm not sure if I just have a problem in my own head! Either way, I would never want to come across as needy

l just don't know what to do. It's too good and hard to leave but too painful and tormenty to stay

something2say Fri 14-Aug-15 21:05:58

Difficult. But it's easy to see when someone isn't as into us as we are into them. Personally I would come to terms with the feeling you have, painful tho it is, and live accordingly. Maybe plan a few activities of your own, pick up a few old friendships and see if he cares. If he doesn't, you have your answer, plus you have a perspective and a life going on. In my sad experience, sad but free I might add.....what we sense does tend to be what is true. Always admit it and always have a life outside of your relationship. Then if the relationship ends, you won't die. X good luck x

category1 Fri 14-Aug-15 21:43:10

It shouldn't be angst and pain. This is a big deal.

If you aren't happy, then that should concern him, and if it doesn't concern him then fgs bin him off. If he can't there for you emotionally, then it doesn't have a future.

Smilingforth Fri 14-Aug-15 22:03:38

I think you need to have a frank conversation. You might not get the answer you want but you'll have clarityy

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