Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Ffs Facebook - am I crazy???????

(46 Posts)
WhoDunn1ts Thu 06-Aug-15 21:42:18

Ok, not really sure if this is the place to do this because I'm new to it all, so if I'm doing it wrong in sorry. blush

I'm not sure if I'm being very unreasonable and just stupid or if I've got a valid point for being upset so hopefully someone can help me smile
I've been with my bf for 9 yrs, since we were kids really. He's never been interested in Facebook, but I've always had one, and he would always use mine to just browse through stories, and watch videos, even contact a few of his mates and family.
Last week he decided to set up his own fb account, when I asked if he was going to add me he said no. I'm OK with that. I was just wondering. Even though it upset me a little I thought nothing of it and thought he needs his privacy.
The thing that's annoyed me is that every time he isn't near his phone or there's a chance I may use it for something (phone call/Google maps) he completely logs out of his fb app. This is everytime he uses Facebook, he logs straight out of the app, does anyone else do this? And on top of that he is refusing to add me.
He used my Facebook account the other day to have a look at his own to see what people who he isn't friends with could see on his profile, he noticed that people could see his friends and photos even if hey weren't his friend, so he changed it all, so that you can only see anything if your friends.

Its really upset me and I find it insulting that after years of him having access to all my emails, Facebook and everything else he feels the need to log out of his fb account just in case Im around. Am I bring unreasonable with the way I feel about it?

pocketsaviour Thu 06-Aug-15 21:45:34

I would feel insulted. And suspicious.

DragonsCanHop Thu 06-Aug-15 21:47:37

Trust your instincts.

I would ask out right to see his account, tell him he has made you feel paranoid. You will get your answer in 2 seconds by looking in his eyes.

lunar1 Thu 06-Aug-15 21:48:45

I wouldn't trust him here. Complete double standards for a start, he has opened his account for a reason and is now being secretive.

WhoDunn1ts Thu 06-Aug-15 21:49:37

I don't want to ask him and sound like a whiny little jealous thing because I've never been like that and don't want our relationship to go that way

WorraLiberty Thu 06-Aug-15 21:51:22

Sounds very strange OP, like he has something to hide.

Did he actually give you a reason why he won't add you?

Oh and change your password on your own account.

TopCivilServant Thu 06-Aug-15 21:52:16

Suspicious. Very.

DragonsCanHop Thu 06-Aug-15 21:53:19

Ok, keep it going this way then, He doesn't want you to see his Facebook because he is really in to knitting and doesn't want you to know.

WhoDunn1ts Thu 06-Aug-15 21:53:32

Yeah his reason was that he sees me everyday so why do I need to speak to him on Facebook. I've changed my password.
I'm glad you lot don't think I'm crazy

MyPreciousRing Thu 06-Aug-15 21:55:46

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WhoDunn1ts Thu 06-Aug-15 22:01:46

Thanks for the replies everyone. smile

Doodlebug300 Thu 06-Aug-15 22:04:00

The fact that you know he logs out means you've checked and this means you don't trust him. I assume you have a reason for this. Trust your instinct.

SlaggyIsland Thu 06-Aug-15 22:05:47

That is frankly bizarre, and yes very suspicious.

WhoDunn1ts Thu 06-Aug-15 22:06:41

Noooo. Lol, I didn't check at all. My little one was using his phone the other day when he was sitting next to me. He pressed the home button on Samsung phones when you want to clear the background apps. And I noticed that his Facebook app was at the normal log in page. So I asked him if he logs out of his Facebook everytime he uses it and he said yeah but didn't say why.

WhoDunn1ts Thu 06-Aug-15 22:08:10

And BTW, I haven't touched his phone since that day. Not even to move it. If he feels the need to do that then I refuse to give him the satisfaction by goig anywhere near his phone.

0x530x610x750x630x79 Thu 06-Aug-15 22:09:35

i would leave your phone at work, and ask to use his facebook one evening, just like he used to use yours.

NoArmaniNoPunani Thu 06-Aug-15 22:10:28

It all sounds suspicious.

Glitteryarse Thu 06-Aug-15 22:10:32

Wonder what he wants to keep from you? .... Hhmmm

WhoDunn1ts Thu 06-Aug-15 22:12:25

It's good to know that I'm not going crazy but now I'm very suspicious cos of all the comments.confused

OstentatiousBreastfeeder Thu 06-Aug-15 22:16:41

He's messaging other women, or has someone on there he doesn't want you to know about.

Or he's really into knitting, like Dragons said.

DragonsCanHop Thu 06-Aug-15 22:18:12

You openly gave him your fb because you had nothing to hide. Why should that be different know he has fb?

Try what 0x suggested and see his reaction.

WhoDunn1ts Thu 06-Aug-15 22:20:52

Seems like I need to have a proper chat with him. Although I know what he'll say. Just that I'm being paranoid or stupid. Perhaps I should show him this post to prove that other people think it's weird and its not just me being unreasonable because no doubt he'll convince me that I am being unreasonable.

GaryBaldy Thu 06-Aug-15 22:21:29

Yes I would be asking him to hand over his phone logged into Facebook so you could look at it.

If he has nothing to hide then it won't be a problem, but IMO it doesn't sound good.

Pilgrimforever Thu 06-Aug-15 22:25:35

I log out of Facebook every time I use the Facebook app or if somebody else asks to use my phone.
I am friends with DH on there though so slightly different.
I also clear my browsing history on my devices whenever I go on the Internet on them.

WhoDunn1ts Thu 06-Aug-15 22:50:31

Thanks everyone. You've been helpfulsmile

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: