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Ex h won't let me move on

(4 Posts)
NoraLouca Thu 06-Aug-15 21:41:04

I left ex h nearly 3 years ago due to aggressive, controlling behaviour and also because we just didn't get on. We never spent any time together, didn't talk, nothing.

We have 2 dc and have more or less managed to co parent although he has had his moments. I am not a saint but I am never verbally abusive and am always reliable wrt the dc. Just for context.

I recently met a new bloke, which I told ex about as I thought it would be best to tell him first, with a view to introducing the dc at some point. This hasn't happened yet.

Ex has since been awful, calling me the worst things. He hadn't been like this for a long time and I thought he'd got his act together. He keeps threatening to change childcare arrangements at the last minute, because in his words 'you're a dirty whore hanging around with god knows who' and I need to remember I have dc. I never for one second forget the dc and he knows this.

I don't know what I'm posting for really. New bloke is the first since I left ex, if that's relevant. I'm just so tired and don't even want to see ex anymore. I'm used to the way he speaks to me but it's actually upset me this time. It never used to.

pocketsaviour Thu 06-Aug-15 21:46:31

Oh dear, what a cunt.

Is there an official contact order in place?

starlight2007 Thu 06-Aug-15 21:48:33

I think you need to be clear. I would message him email him, tell him you were informing him of a fact not asking his opinion.

I think you may think he has moved on but learnt very quickly he hasn't..It just ok while on his terms.

How old are he saying this stuff in front of kids. if it is on the phone inform him you will not continue any conversation on the subject.

You need to be very clear what is and isn't ok.. Can I suggest that if he is emailing or texting these you retain them for evidence.

goddessofsmallthings Thu 06-Aug-15 22:01:58

He's not stopping you moving on, honey, but you'll stop yourself if you listen to his crap.

If you haven't done so already, set up an email account which is solely for any necessry communication in relation to the dc and send a missive telling him to take a flying jump that any further theats/badmouthing of his dcs' mother will be reported to the police as harassment.

Needlessto say, block him on your mobile/social media sites and don't delete any emails he sends you that are less than conciliatory.

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