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do I reply to this and do I tell him?

(63 Posts)
lou5a Sat 25-Jul-15 23:32:26

I'm seeing a guy, we aren't official yet but think we will be soon. anyway, a friend of his always likes my Facebook and Instagram posts and he got my number through a friend over a year ago. the guy I'm seeing does get a bit miffed when he likes my things.

the guy has txted me tonight asking if I am out in town. he has a gf! I don't want to reply to him and I forgot I even had his number tbh, but I feel really sneaky now Incase my guy finds out he txted me and I haven't said anything.

what do I do?

QforCucumber Sat 25-Jul-15 23:37:12

If you're not out just say no and have a good night? Maybe he doesn't want anything sinister, it may be a crap night so he's texting people to see if anyone he knows is out?

lou5a Sat 25-Jul-15 23:38:45

I haven't spoke to the guy in over a year except when he comments my things on Facebook.. I know he fancies me, it's why he got my number to begin with. I feel that if I reply my guy will go mad but if ignore it I just feel sneaky by not telling him sad

I don't think it's an innocent txt

HeyDuggee Sat 25-Jul-15 23:39:35

If you don't reply then the guy you're dating can see he's friend is an ass for trying it on and you did nothing. I'd ignore it and hopefully the guy will think he got your number wrong

HeyDuggee Sat 25-Jul-15 23:39:57


lou5a Sat 25-Jul-15 23:40:50

I just feel bad for keeping it to myself. I honestly thought I'd deleted his number, so I don't want my guy to know I've got it lol therefore I cannot mention he txt me but the same time this feels very sneaky even though I haven't done anything x

GraysAnalogy Sat 25-Jul-15 23:43:13

Well either tell him or don't.

Personally I'd just block this other fella, I would have done it a while ago.

gamerchick Sat 25-Jul-15 23:45:28

You're feeling a little electric thread of excitement running through your body aren't you? It's why you want to feel there is something in nothing... A little bit of secrecy to give a thrill?

No? Then ignore the text, delete the number and forget about it. Or tell your dude you've had a text from his pal.

No drama.

Cabrinha Sat 25-Jul-15 23:45:39

Are you a teenager?
Why are you putting up with someone you aren't even "official with" getting the arse over who likes your Facebook posts?
He's not even your boyfriend and you have to worry about him going mad?
Your problem isn't this guy texting you, it's this <don't know what to call a bloke who isn't your boyfriend>

Bogeyface Sat 25-Jul-15 23:46:42

Why cant you tell him?

Something like "oh, [eye roll] guess who texted last night? Your mate X. I didnt bother replying, cheeky sod"

That said, the friend is trying it on, your BF hasnt spoken to him about it, you havent told him to sod off and its all being ignored. Seems a bit...childish, sorry but it does.

If this man is bothering then text him a "I am not interested, please dont text me again" and block his number and on FB, and ask your BF why he hasnt said "Stop trying it on with my GF!"

OneDayWhenIGrowUp Sat 25-Jul-15 23:47:09

Why does someone you're seeing casually get miffed when a mutual acquaintance presses a like button on something you post on the Internet? What on Earth has it got to do with him? I spy a red flag.

You also have nothing to feel guilty about. Someone sent you a text.

How old are you, you sound pretty young and with poor boundaries about healthy relationships.

lou5a Sat 25-Jul-15 23:47:21

because I know it will annoy him, the same as if my friend constantly liked his stuff or texted him a txt like that! I just feel sneaky not telling him but I also know it will piss him off if he knew.

I'm just gonna ignore it.

NickiFury Sat 25-Jul-15 23:48:18

If you're boyfriend would "go mad" over an unsolicited text then he's a bit of a tool imvho and I wouldn't be putting up with that if I were you.

Delete the text and don't think about it again. I mean, really, is this an actual problem? confused

Bogeyface Sat 25-Jul-15 23:49:08

I get that he would be pissed off.

What I dont get is why you are not telling him. Presumably he will be pissed of with his "friend" and not you, so why not tell him?

If the issue is that he will be pissed of with you then I agree with a PP that the issue isnt the "friend" but your boyfriend.

LadyB49 Sat 25-Jul-15 23:49:14

Don't reply and delete his number.
Then no-one knows you got the message and you can't get any more.
And don't respond to any of his 'likes' on FB etc.

Bogeyface Sat 25-Jul-15 23:49:38

off not of!

HirplesWithHaggis Sat 25-Jul-15 23:54:00

If "your guy", with whom you are not even "official" yet, may "go mad" that you have received an unsolicited and pretty vague text from some other man, you need to ditch "your guy" asap.

Red flags all over.

lou5a Sat 25-Jul-15 23:57:47

cause he will wonder why I still have his number saved I guess? I dunno, it's what I would think.

Cabrinha Sat 25-Jul-15 23:58:36

If it's what you would think, then you also need to grow up and stop dating until you can deal with these situations.

Cabrinha Sun 26-Jul-15 00:00:47

I don't think the one who texted is a friend of the <insert word for immature jealous guy who doesn't want to be her boyfriend 'yet'>

Maryz Sun 26-Jul-15 00:05:35

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Anon4Now2015 Sun 26-Jul-15 00:15:44

You're not even in a relationship with this man and he gets annoyed when another man likes things on your facebook and would go mad if another man texts you? And you are actually contemplating having a relationship with him?Are you serious? Can you not see the big red flags?

goddessofsmallthings Sun 26-Jul-15 00:20:37

How old are you, OP? Do you have dc fervently hopes not?.

princesspink7404 Sun 26-Jul-15 00:56:56

Ignore and block I'd say.

DoreenLethal Sun 26-Jul-15 06:16:12

Respond 'who is this?'

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