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Struggling to end relationship

(5 Posts)
YellowTangerine Sat 25-Jul-15 22:16:03

Firstly I have a DD who is 6 months. I have been with my partner on and off for roughly 3 years. We don't get on anymore. We argue and make each other miserable. The problem is I'm struggling to end the relationship for good. I'm terrified of being alone. I'm worried about money even though he doesn't help much. We see each other one day a week.
Mostly I'm terrified I'll never meet anyone again. I'm overweight and have massive confidence issues. I have no friends so it feels like if I loose him I loose everything.

I'm not even certain if I love him anymore. I know this needs to end before my daughter gets older and can see what is happening.

Any advice on how to just break up and stick to it? I always end up running back confused

princesspink7404 Sat 25-Jul-15 22:28:57

YellowTangerine my sympathy to you.

Ending a relationship is hard, I finally walked away two months ago after 4 years on/off. I did not feel upset in any way and it was like a weight lifted off my shoulders. I wondered if I really did love him as I was unemotional but sometimes I wonder if I have just put a wall up around my emotions because of it.

If you really think that you cannot make each other happy, yes it is best to leave now. Your DD will still pick up on unhappy vibes and she needs her Mum to be positive. Hopefully he will still have an involvement in her life.

I totally get the confidence thing. I've lost all mine and I am really trying to get it back but not easy. You say you have no friends .. how come? Do you have any family you can turn to? Perhaps try to get out with DD to some baby groups where you can meet new people - this is always a good starter especially with a baby, as strictly speaking you are not going into somewhere alone blush. The weight issue I get too - so hard after having a baby too. I bet you are not half as bad as you think you are smile

I have never minded being alone but I have some friends in same boat as you. As a result, they jump from relationship to relationship (not suggesting you would btw) that never work out because they don't focus on getting themselves happy first. Sorry if that all sounds a bit cheesy - I went on a Positive Thinking Course recently (not that I've managed to take much of it on board myself).

Stay strong. It is better to be on your own, than alone in a relationship.

GotABitTricky Sat 25-Jul-15 22:35:56

Good idea to " try to get out with DD to some baby groups where you can meet new people "

Last line of post above very thought provoking - " It is better to be on your own, than alone in a relationship."

YellowTangerine Sat 25-Jul-15 22:57:57

It's so hard. I'm receiving the silent treatment at the moment. I've been to baby groups before but always feel so out of place as I'm 23 and the rest are older than me so it seems they all have friends their own age.

princesspink7404 Sun 26-Jul-15 00:17:04

Perhaps he is unhappy too but doesn't want to end it either? Could it be that you just both sit down to talk and is there a possibility you could part amicably? I know it is a long shot but you never know.

Yes going to baby groups can be hard when you are a different age but please don't let that put you off. You might be pleasantly surprised. Maybe do a little bit of research into different groups and give them a try. I appreciate it is hard but you can do it.

If you lose him you won't be losing everything as you have DD as she is the most important of all. You say you only see him once a week ... so if you split tbh it sounds like it won't make much difference?

Sorry haven't got that much good advice, more a shoulder for you flowers

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