Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Anyone else wonder if they'll ever meet Mr Right?

(13 Posts)
Jenna333 Tue 21-Jul-15 22:20:59

I've had a failed marriage and various long term relationships but have never met anyone that's it's either felt right with or it has been the right situation. At 41 I'm now just doing my own thing, getting on with life and not looking.
Just wondered if anyone else sometimes wonders if the right person will ever come in to their life.

LadyofDunedin Tue 21-Jul-15 22:22:26

Completely !

theblairbitchproject Tue 21-Jul-15 22:23:09

All the time. Its even worse when your youger because people like to point out the obvious and insist "there is plenty of time"

Im just incredibly fussy so I dont think he will ever come along to be honest

Cookiecake Tue 21-Jul-15 22:24:49

Yes, I'm mid 20's and a single mum and I wonder.....i don't really go out much so I guess I'm probably not helping myself. I also think I have quite high standards (after my ex). I feel that whether I have a relationship or not in future it's always going to be complicated as I have my DS.

pocketsaviour Tue 21-Jul-15 22:44:03

Just wondered if anyone else sometimes wonders if the right person will ever come in to their life.

I realised a long time ago there is no "Mr Right". There are a succession of possible partners, each of whom have their own pros and cons. Your goal is to find one with the best ratio of good to bad, and with their particular bad points falling within your list of "acceptable drawbacks" but none in the "dealbreaker" category.

Of course what makes it all harder is that one woman's bad point is another woman's good point grin

FolkGirl Tue 21-Jul-15 22:52:16

No, not any more. I'm eternally optimistic and hope that one day I'll walk into somewhere, get chatting to someone and that will be it...

The reality is, though, that I'm emotionally too damaged to even consider it. I don't even know where I'd start any more.

I wouldn't inflict myself on anyone decent and wouldn't consider anyone who wasn't. Doesn't leave many options really!

Denton2406 Tue 21-Jul-15 22:54:45

Totally agree, I don't think he exists. I'm late 40s, never been married, go through spurts of serious online dating every now and again but they all end up being a bunch of idiots!! So I give up looking, then think I will have another go, meet someone online who I think is nice, then they suddenly stop replying or disappear!

SueBigFatSue Tue 21-Jul-15 22:56:23

Cookiecake is me.

No, I agree with everything said. I feel like I won't meet anyone and that id be content with that. But then, I won't be. I want the happy family life but it's hard to meet anyone that you can 100% trust around your children. I don't know, it seems impossible at the moment.

FolkGirl Tue 21-Jul-15 23:03:51

The tragic thing is that I don't have a long list of requirements. I don't care about money or 'stuff'.

I want someone who shares some of my interests and supports the others. Someone who is kind and thoughful and loyal. Someone to cherish and, maybe eventually, love me. Someone I fancy and who fancies me.

I don't even seem to be able to manage that.

HuckleberryMishMash Tue 21-Jul-15 23:07:46

I'm with pocketsaviour on this. Looking for Mr Right makes it seem like there's a tick-list of criteria.

Much better to aim to meet someone who you get along well with and whose downsides are far outweighed by the things about him that make you compatible.

Having said that though, even having come around to thinking of it this way, I haven't met Mr-enough-things-right yet. Although I'm looking forward to a 3rd date with someone who when I was looking for 'Mr Right' I would have discounted but I've decided that as the dates are fun and he's easy to spend time with that I'll give things time to turn into enough-things-right.

Jenna333 Wed 22-Jul-15 05:34:41

That's a good way of looking at it, weighing up the pros and cons. I'm fairly easy going which is probably how I end up with the wrong guys. I've decided if there's a next time to only proceed if there's a definite attraction as I've learnt for me that really doesn't grow if it's not there initially.

FolkGirl Wed 22-Jul-15 07:22:18

I agree, Jenna.

And don't ignore any warning signs, however small they seem. Because I've learnt it's never a one off, or insignificant.

Imustgodowntotheseaagain Wed 22-Jul-15 07:52:04

I'm concentrating on being happy on my own after a failed marriage, an EA relationships, a few short-term shags and 2 years with a guy I really loved but he wasn't in the right place (emotionally or geographically). He sent me an email the other day after a year and a half but I haven't followed it up, I don't think you can go back.

I'm open to meeting someone but the universe isn't delivering at the moment.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now