I'd just like to start by asking you to be kind. I'm feeling a bit sensitive at the moment and I'm willing to be told that I'm in the wrong, just please be nice about it. Also, I'm not sure I've posted this in the right section, it just seemed to be the most appropriate.
Basically the problem is that I'm bored. I know its a major first world problem and most people have worse things going on.
Bit of background,... DP and I have been together 6 years. We have an almost 2 year old and a 3.10 year old. I'm a sahm but I work on Saturdays. DP used to work full time until a few months ago but due to a injury had to take a few months off. He will be starting his new job in a months time. We are both in our mid 20s. Not sure if all of that will be relevant but I don't want to drip feed.
We've finally got to the stage where the children are both past the baby stage and all the breastfeeding and co sleeping has come to an end. They can be put to bed at 7pm and won't wake up for at least a few hours. Since DC1 has been born, we've been out for one meal. That was about 18 months ago! Fair enough back then, the kids were little and due to breastfeeding and co sleeping we couldn't really leave them. our eldest also had extremely bad separation anxiety. But now there is absolutely no reason why we couldn't pay a babysitter to sit in the house while we went out for a drink or a meal or something.
Anyway, I'll get to the point, DP just doesn't really want to. He's just happy to sit in the house and watch Netflix every single night. I sit in our bedroom watching stuff on the tablet because I've got nothing else to do. If I try and talk to him, I get annoyed because it takes him a minute to answer me because he's too busy on his phone or watching TV. it's like he doesn't want to speak to me. I suggest going out and he pretends to be all up for it until I come to arranging it and then he's tired or can't be bothered or needs to stay in for whatever reason. We've been spending so much time together recently as hes been off work, but its always with the kids. I just want to do some adult only things once a month/6 weeks.
I don't have any proper friends. I've tried but I'm not from here and I've just given up now. I live in large village and its hard to be accepted here, so I can't even go out with other people. DP goes out once a week with his friends so I'm coming to the conclusion that it must be me. Whenever I try to talk about it, he just says that I'm bored all the time and its not normal.
It's not just the evenings that he doesn't like going out. We normally get our shopping delivered as we live out in the middle of nowhere. The other week I lied and said they didn't have any delivery slots left so we would have to actually go and do the shopping ourselves, just so that we didn't have to stay in again. I don't drive so I can't even go out myself. I am just so desperately lonely.
Because of my job, I can't increase my hours. it's a one day only thing. I have been looking for something with more hours though.
so I need to know am I relying on DP too much or is he boring? I do realise that we have kids and we can't be going out to wild parties every night of the week, but other couples with young children still manage to go out once in while don't they? Am I honesty asking for too much?
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Is DP boring or do I rely on him too much for entertainment?
LateDay · 19/07/2015 21:54
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Message withdrawn at poster's request.
We've lived here almost 4 years. I've always felt a bit lonely, but I'd always been so busy with the kids and DP at work, so a lot of my time was taken up and I hadn't really noticed how bad it was. We've only recently managed to get DC2 out of our bed and I've near enough stopped breast feeding, which led to him sleeping better. I've now got a lot more time in the evenings.
I'm not looking for a perfect date! Even going for a drive or walk alone together would be great. One drink together in the pub having an actual conversation would be lovely.
I know I need to learn to drive. The pub job idea is good. I'll go down tomorrow and see if they need anyone. 
I got a dog for the same reason. Life is fun and lovely again 
My idea - get an audible subscription so someone is talking to you and go on walks with your dog!
How much have you tried to explain to your DP how you feel? If he's a nice guy and he cares about you then he should be willing to change a bit to make you happy. Sitting in different rooms looking at different screens doesn't sound like much fun.
Can you try to watch the same films or series together for a start some evenings. Also, agree no screens (they can become too much of a habit) a couple of evenings a week and find something else to do. Like play cards, or a board game, or cook a meal together (this is what we sometimes do - plan a nice meal, do the prep together then have a glass of wine while the food's in the oven .. it's nice).
I do think going out together occasionally is important. And that you should definitely learn to drive asap if you can possibly afford to. But I feel that changing the way you both spend time at home in the evenings is really important.
On a slightly different tack, maybe your DP is bored himself? I suspect once he's back to work and more engaged with the world he might be more enthusiastic generally. He sounds pretty lethargic just now and that can happen if you're used to being at work then find yourself stuck at home.
You are both in your mid-20s and life should be more fun than this! Talk to him - don't complain or blame him, just suggest some stuff you can do together. Good luck
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To me it sounds like a combination of him being set in his ways combined with you not having your independence where you live (infrequent public transport, no local friends).
Could you tell your DP that you are feeling isolated and would like to do more together seeing as it is difficult to get out and about and that you need a change of scenery because who doesn't from time to time?! My boyfriend is a gamer and would happily spend the whole weekend indoors gaming but is also happy to go out so long as I make the arrangements/suggestions. Some people would find this frustrating but I don't mind. Had you thought of throwing caution to the wind and just making the plans? Tell him you need to get out for your own sanity so be free on Xday. Then book a babysitter, buy cinema tickets or book a table in a restaurant. If he refuses to go, then call a cab and go on your own. This isn't ideal obviously but I do think that you need to at least try this set in stone method just to test the waters and see if he's just being a bit set in his ways or if there's a larger problem. His reaction will let you know. If it's the former, then as my mother used to say about school "he'll enjoy it when he gets there"
I don't think going out for a meal once a fortnight will resolve your feelings of boredom though. If you really can't move somewhere less off the beaten track then I'd seriously look into learning to drive. Also turn to the Internet - how about a home study course? Depending on your budget you can do little independent workshops on just about any subject all the way up to a degree. I'm stuck indoors a lot due to health and doing a degree or other course keeps you busy plus provides an online community to participate in. Revisit an old hobby or find a new one. Photography? Art? Also, find some stuff on Netflix or on a catch up service that you can watch together with your DP . I highly recommend The 100, Hannibal, Helix, Heros, Breaking Bad, Walking Dead... Something that you can discuss and place bets on the plot twists or find a nice series to watch yourself. Brothers & Sister's and the L Word are both series my boyfriend didn't want to watch but I loved.
This is a very long reply, sorry. Insomnia does that 
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