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UPDATE to blindsided

(9 Posts)
magiccatlitter Mon 06-Jul-15 09:55:17

First post

I thought I would post an update to the bizarre behaviour of my dh. I'm scheduled to leave on the 6th of August and it can't come soon enough at this point.

He had asked me a couple of days ago to put money into his account to pay a bill and I said I would as soon as my pay went in. So today, I go to him and mention it and he said, he already paid it.

I'm like ok how did you do that? I thought you didn't have any money.

He said that his facebook friends gave him £500 for his birthday last week. So here he lied to me and got back on fb, added back the b I told him not to talk to anymore. Then he must have posted up some sob story about how broke and poor he is and it's his birthday which he does't celebrate so people sent him money. WTF! So I go look at my fb and see his name there but apparently he blocked me!

I asked him why he blocked me and he said because I was nasty and disrespectful to his friends and he has a reputation to uphold! WTF?

So we got into it and he had the cheek again to insult my appearance mentioning I had bits of grey hair showing through and about my teeth. He said he was embarrassed to be seen with me. I said do you think I enjoy going somewhere with someone who hasn't bathed in a month and hasn't cut his hair in over a year?

Then he said he felt like a prisoner that he didn't dare go anywhere or do anything or face wrath from me. I seriously wonder if he has a brain tumour?

He said he wanted to go to some political rally but didn't because of me. I said I never cared if he went anywhere. He has always been the one who never wanted to go anywhere and a perpetual wet blanket to any fun thing that was planned and now all of a sudden he wants to be a social butterfly but wants to blame me why he can't.

I did tell him if I'm so terrible, there is the door. He didn't have anything to say to that of course.

His story is a repeat as I've heard it all before. It's his MO. He blamed his father for all his failures in life, why he had no friends, no job, had to move around with his father.

So now that he has made online friends with this political activist group, he is playing the poor poor victim to them and blaming me why he can't participate with them. They, for now, believe his bullshit and he's gotten money off them. Who knows how much really?

It is just beyond bizarre and I can't wait to be rid at this point.

nozzz Mon 06-Jul-15 09:58:33

Haven't read the first thread, what is the significance of 6th August? Can you not separate before then?

magiccatlitter Mon 06-Jul-15 10:08:31

I will be starting a new work contract elsewhere away from him. I have to sort out my things and pack and move to storage, and it will take a little while to do that.

Eminado Mon 06-Jul-15 10:16:26

You are talking to him waaaaayyyyy too much. About things that change nothing.

Disengage.

magiccatlitter Mon 06-Jul-15 10:26:30

You're right. I hardly spoke to him at all until the conversation about the bill and I got sucked in.

These conversations change nothing. He's still a jerk.

Isetan Thu 09-Jul-15 09:08:29

Your relationship is over and you are not friends, disengage. Focus your energies on tasks that will benefit you and avoid behaviour that sucks you back into this dysfunctional relationship, he ain't your problem.

magiccatlitter Fri 10-Jul-15 08:20:34

Today he tells me he doesn't want a divorce. I wish I could get out of here so he'll stop messing with my head!

Spadequeen Fri 10-Jul-15 08:24:42

It's not just his choice though is it.

magiccatlitter Fri 10-Jul-15 08:30:31

Nope, it's too late. He's been so mean, I don't love him anymore.

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