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What is love? How does it feel?

(7 Posts)
GinAndSonic Sat 04-Jul-15 13:46:06

As above. Im not sure i really know what love feels like. I think i loved my most recent ex. In fact, i still do. But reading the thread about limerance is making me wonder.
If ive never felt love, will i recognise it if i meet someone else?

DisgraceToTheYChromosome Sat 04-Jul-15 16:34:04

Yes. You will become a burden to friends, an irritation to bystanders and a source of amusement to the cynical.

Not that you'll give a shit, because the world will be filled with rainbows and unicorns. grin

Fauchelevent Sat 04-Jul-15 17:28:51

I think you will, but not as you expect it.

For me, how I know I love my boyfriend is because I'm prepared to make sacrifices for him that I wouldn't make for anyone else - as in, I put my wants aside for what is best for him/us/our future, I've overcome things I never thought I would because it's best for us/our future. Things you think you'd find intolerable are the greatest things you love about them. It's similar to the way you love friends or family, but different, more special, more intimate.

It's also like looking at your best friend, realising you are so very attracted to them and as an added benefit you actually can shag them! (crass)

and yes, you will irritate bystanders and then realise you've become "one of those"!

GinAndSonic Sat 04-Jul-15 19:41:51

See, i think it is / was love with my ex. Hes my best friend. When we got together it felt like coming home. I still get that feeling when im in his arms.
Id like to stop loving him i think. I dont see us getting back together. And i know love is just chemicals, so theres no reason i cant meet and love someone else. But loving him still gets in the way of that.

Fauchelevent Sun 05-Jul-15 00:10:54

Oh gosh, yes - the feeling of "coming home" when you're in their arms.

How long has it been? You'll feel it again - it's never just a one time thing because you're right, it's just chemicals. Right now it's just hard because I'm guessing it hasn't been a while so there hasn't been the time to heal, move on and focus on you. Take your time, it'll come naturally - but you will definitely love and be loved again.

mommyof23kids Sun 05-Jul-15 03:13:21

Love doesn't mean anything unless it's backed up with respect, friendship and attraction. Don't get serious about someone until you have all four. It's possible to be deeply in love with someone who is horrible to you but that doesn't mean you should stick around.

lushilaoshi Sun 05-Jul-15 09:11:08

I think love feels different to different people and also goes through so many different stages in a relationship. I said I loved my husband in the giddy days when we first met, and five years later I still love him but in a very different way: now my love is deeper and stronger but definitely less starry-eyed and passionate, because I know him so well and our relationship has come through some very rocky patches. I imagine my love for him will continue to change for the rest of our lives.

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