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Online Dating...and the minefield of it!

(8 Posts)
officeworker Tue 30-Jun-15 21:35:46


Is it just me or does online dating seem to be full of crazy people!! They either send one message, seem dead on keen, and you never hear from them again. Or message and message and nothing ever comes of it!

So far I've had:

1) A guy who isn't my type at all, but we had a spark surprisingly. Constant flirting through texts. Met for a date. Kissed. But then decided we would be better as friends and we both talk about our crazy online dating stories to each other

2) A guy from Tinder. After a day of talking he asks to meet, again not my type. No connection, no spark but in my stupid mind I say yes and agree to it. Fortunately no mobile numbers have been swapped and he seems to have stopped messaging on Tinder.

3) A guy I super like. We messaged again on Tinder, hot, funny, sporty...good to talk to. But he just doesn't flirt! Our text messages are like essays and I want to ask him to meet, but he hasn't gave any indication he wants to. We message about our day and what we like/don't like, but I want him to want me!!

Please tell me I'm not the only one going insane, it seems everyone has a characteristic I want...but no complete package yet!!

kua Tue 30-Jun-15 21:44:24

Sounds like the norm to me.

Welcome to the crazy world of OLD.

Writerwannabe83 Tue 30-Jun-15 21:50:48

I had a guy message me once asking if he could come to my house, wrap me in tin-foil and have sex with me as he has a fetish for robots grin

QuietLady81 Tue 30-Jun-15 21:57:41

I'm ready to give up. I've had either rude pics or guys being full on as in after a few messages they are planning our future! Last week I thought I finally found someone sensible. His messages were funny and my kind of humour but no mention of meeting up. I realised it was me always initiating messages so I left it. He finally messaged me so I thought good he must be keen. Still no mention of meeting up so I drop hints. He started making excuses like he needed to get to know me better (this was after six days of messaging) and now he has gone cold.

How long do you normally wait before meeting? I don't want to be messaging for days as you don't know who you are talking to.

Cabrinha Tue 30-Jun-15 22:11:50

There are certainly some crazies, but none of your three examples seem that crazy to me!

No.2 sounds like he was feeling just like you - no spark. So backed off.

And No.3 - if you want to meet him, just ask him, surely? I generally don't flirt with people before I meet them, and I'm a really flirtatious person in real life! But I'm very wary that you can meet someone and instantly think "hell no!" so I don't risk it!

Join us on the Dating thread grin

kua Tue 30-Jun-15 22:15:39

Ok, take a breath. This is what you do NOW.

I'm not sure what site you are using but this goes for all.

1 Block all that you would be in no way interested in. This takes time but trust me it is worth it.

2 Any one that has contacted you immediately when you first joined as in the the first few minutes. BLOCK.These are wolves and prey on newbies.

3. Anyone that within a couple of messages initiates sex conversations/ invites other pics. BLOCK.

4. If after several days( don't leave it weeks) of messaging there is no mention of meeting up. They are either married or just playing with the idea. Which unfortunately you see on the dating thread here, where people are too scared to take the leap but forget that others have done so.

kua Tue 30-Jun-15 22:22:48

Oh, and number 5 . Be pro active and take control. What do you wish in a partner? Go fishing.

MadeMan Tue 30-Jun-15 23:29:09

"I had a guy message me once asking if he could come to my house, wrap me in tin-foil and have sex with me as he has a fetish for robots"

Sounds more like a fetish for Sunday joints. Did he ask you about mint sauce?

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