Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

God, I'm such a bitch

(36 Posts)
winkywinkola Sat 27-Jun-15 21:42:20

So, I reversed into a friend's car the other day. Not hard. I made two scratches on the front of her car. No dent. Her au pair was parked in it when it happened.

I called my friend to tell her. I was so worried about the cost. So was h.

She shrugged it off saying the car was old and pretty knackered and she would let me know. I went round the other night to have a look at the car at her request. It looked like I thought. Two scratches about two inches long.

She gave me a cup of tea and I texted h to tell him what she said and added "Hmmm. She's going to get money out of us". And sent it to her by mistake.

Why? Why did I type that? Why didn't I text "and she's being so understanding and non demanding about it all. We need to pay for the scratches."

She said to me I sent the text to the wrong person. I could have died. And felt deep shame and apologised.

How can I make things okay? She's acting all normal and friendly but I can't bear that she thinks I'm this nasty person. I mean, if I read that text I would be so offended. We are friends. We help each other out with childcare etc.

TokenGinger Sat 27-Jun-15 21:51:37

Calm down. That text isn't as bad as you think. It's because you feel mortified at sending it that you're stressing so much.

If she's a good friend, trust that she says it's fine. If my friend send that to me by accident, I'd laugh.

SiobhanSharpe Sat 27-Jun-15 21:55:11

Apologise. Say you were very worried out the possible cost and Sent it without really thinking. Apologise again. Offer to pay for the scratches.

winkywinkola Sat 27-Jun-15 21:55:39

Really? I would think "what a cow"

winkywinkola Sat 27-Jun-15 21:56:34

I've offered to the point of insistence. I feel dreadful about it. Ott?

LazyLouLou Sat 27-Jun-15 21:57:50

She is going to get money out of us, now I have seen the scratches.

That's what you posted, wasn't it?

winkywinkola Sat 27-Jun-15 22:01:03


LazyLouLou Sat 27-Jun-15 22:03:32

Yes it was... you just didn't need to say that to DH because you had discussed it before you went round. There were only 2 possible outcomes once you had seen the scratches

1. She isn't going to need any money out of us
2. She is going to get some money out of us

Now stop overthinking it. She either bills you or she doesn't.

winkywinkola Sat 27-Jun-15 22:11:44

She must bill us. I hope she does. But my problem is my text and that I've lost a friend.

ALaughAMinute Sat 27-Jun-15 22:13:33

I think it's mildly embarrassing but not half as bad as you seem to think.

Apologies and buy her a nice bunch of flowers and forget about it!

LazyLouLou Sat 27-Jun-15 22:15:51

But you seem to be the only one who thinks your text was horrible. Most pp agree with me, it was just short, not nasty.

Stop wallowing in it. Nothing you have posted indicates you have lost a friend. But you may piss her off if you insist on being a martyr about this! It was an accident, you have insurance... move on!

OttiliaVonBCup Sat 27-Jun-15 22:16:43

You did fuck up. I would be mortified as well.

But it can't be undone. Don't try to gloss over or wriggle out of it, it will make it worse.

QuiteLikely5 Sat 27-Jun-15 22:33:24

Oh well, you got found out. I can see why your embarrassed and rightly so........I mean she was in the same room as you!

Just let it go. Nothing you can do now. The choice regarding the future of your friendship is in her hands........

winkywinkola Sat 27-Jun-15 22:35:41

And it makes me a bitch. And she will agree. hmm

OttiliaVonBCup Sat 27-Jun-15 22:37:27

Not a bitch.

Just a bit of a cow.
Let it go.
Nothing you can do now.

RexsLittleSlut Sun 28-Jun-15 00:35:19

Not a bitch.
Just a bit of a cow.

That is insane.

What is the difference between "a bitch" and "a cow"?

And do you really think that is an appropriate way to refer to another woman? "A cow"!?! Wow.

SoleSource Sun 28-Jun-15 00:43:13

I'd be hurt that my word to you wasn't good enough. I'd lose trust in you after that.

ScorpioMermaid Sun 28-Jun-15 00:49:36

ouch! I feel your pain OP! wine

have done similar myself, was sending a to text a friend "suchandsuch has been talking about you again, she's got such a big gob" yes, I sent it to suchandsuch with the big gob blush I profusely apologised but luckily she thought it was quite funny and I was let off the hook, no damage done!

milliemanzi Sun 28-Jun-15 00:54:14

Yeah if I were her I'd be a bit annoyed that you sent that even though I hadn't asked for any money at all yet. And I would think it sounded like you were implying I was being shady about it, money "out of us" makes it sound like a con or something?!

But just explain and apologise it's not the end of the world!

FabULouse Sun 28-Jun-15 00:56:12

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

minkGrundy Sun 28-Jun-15 01:03:42

grin fab I hadn't noticed the nn till you pointed it out. In reference to that thread I presume.

OttiliaVonBCup Sun 28-Jun-15 06:56:07


GlitzAndGigglesx Sun 28-Jun-15 07:05:57

If it makes you feel any better I was on a night out a couple of years ago and lost my friend so texted her saying "oi slag where are you" and sent it to my stuck up aunt by accident blush. It must've been about 2am too. Thankfully it was never mentioned again, but I really don't think yours was that bad!

PushingThru Sun 28-Jun-15 07:32:54

I'd talk to her. Apologise & say you acknowledge how it must've sounded resentful about paying the money, but you're not. You typed it when you were tired etc. hence why you also sent it to the wrong person. If she's s good enough friend, she'll move on from it.

PushingThru Sun 28-Jun-15 07:37:40

Oh you were in the same room at the time you sent it! It's just an embarrassing cock up. Just carry on as before.

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: