My H and I are rubbish at communicating. We have been married for 12 years and I have learned that if I say what I feel he gets mega upset and shouts at me. Any effort on my part to raise an issue is taken by him as a personal attack, he won't talk things through but just shouts at me. Which of course winds me up and makes me respond in a way that isn't helpful. So I tend to tiptoe around him except on odd occasions. Which inevitably, like tonight, end in him shouting, stomping out, slamming door etc. over something so trivial, too!
How can I have a sensible conversation with him that enables me to say how I really feel, without him shouting and getting all upset, without really listening to what I need to say?
How can I tell him I don't love him any more, that often I don't even like him; that I am not happy in the relationship, and fear therefore that I am not making him happy either?
We haven't made love for at least two years, he isn't interest in sex and now, I couldn't face doing it with him. He will kiss me goodbye and texts me during the day with messages but the affection if any, is on his side. I don't feel anything.
Reading this back, it makes me sound pretty pathetic. But what can I do to talk an adults, fair and mature approach to trying to tell him how I feel?
I am sorry this is long, but I would so welcome any advice...
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
How do you start a conversation that might end the marriage!
Giraffe11 · 23/06/2015 00:10
This reply has been deleted
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
This reply has been deleted
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.