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Selfish bloody idiot!!

(30 Posts)
3CheekyLittleMonkeys Sun 21-Jun-15 06:12:37

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NoahVale Sun 21-Jun-15 06:16:15

do you really have to stick with him?

YouCantBeSadHoldingACupcake Sun 21-Jun-15 06:21:54

Why are you saying with this man child. He is putting your family in danger. Ltb

3CheekyLittleMonkeys Sun 21-Jun-15 06:22:59

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

3CheekyLittleMonkeys Sun 21-Jun-15 06:33:19

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Vivacia Sun 21-Jun-15 06:45:08

Well you continuing coming on here and having a whinge or you could start doing a bit research and figuring out exactly what the facts would be if you decide to start protecting your children.

spanna41 Sun 21-Jun-15 06:53:47

Do you have smoke alarms in your property? If you don't you should have. The fire service will come round and fit them for free.

Personally I wouldn't put up with this, but we are all different smile

cailindana Sun 21-Jun-15 07:13:13

Why would he get residency? Would he even want it?

afreshstartplease Sun 21-Jun-15 07:15:10

Op I was you this time last year

I put up with such behaviour for years

We have three dc

I am now 8 months post split and not regretting it one bit

Joysmum Sun 21-Jun-15 07:32:14

Fucking hell, being trapped I a marriage because you fear the unknown isn't good.

Make the unknown known so you at least feel you have choices flowers

ALaughAMinute Sun 21-Jun-15 09:38:47

I'm scared about what will happen if we split. We have 3 children together and I worry about him getting residency of them. This tenancy (council property) isn't in my name so I would be the one who has to leave I think?

So sorry you're going through this. Get a free half hour with a solicitor or go and see the CAB to find out what your legal position is. You can't go on like this, you have to do something about it. flowers

Handywoman Sun 21-Jun-15 10:33:55

I mean this nicely, OP, your fear of living like this for the next twenty years should be greater than the fear of setting up a better life without him.

SylvaniansAtEase Sun 21-Jun-15 11:32:26

You HONESTLY THINK that a lazy, self-obsessed, greedy, childish scumbag like this would have the faintest interest in looking after three young children full-time?

Oh sure, if you threatened to leave he'd pop up like a jack in the box spouting about 'going for custody'. Just like every other lazy twat who suddenly sees a glimpse of the future without the built-in cook/cleaner/slave to pick up their empty beer cans and comes out with the thing they PRAY will frighten their OH enough for them to shut up and stay. But it's not true.

Leave. He could have killed you all last night. By staying you're not only giving your kids a TERRIBLE example of how to live, which they will likely copy, but are also putting them in danger.

Maybe go along to the council and explain your situation and the oven thing last night. Say that you are the one not on the tenancy, but it's you and the kids, instead of one single man, who will soon be homeless. I wonder if they can look at the situation and help you. It certainly wouldn't hurt to make an appointment and ask if you can go on the tenancy as from now.

And if he tells you he'll go for custody, try this reply:

'Well yes that might well be the best option. I'll obviously need to set myself up with a new home and new life and will need much more independence than I currently have. Plus it will do you a lot of good to take responsibility for a change - spend your evenings cooking, making sure school uniform is ready, doing homework etc., cleaning, instead of playing on your xbox. Income will need to be split more fairly too so maybe it will be easier for you to e.g. work shorter hours so you can take over school pickups and drop-offs to give me the freedom to work longer hours...' etc.

Watch him shit himself, then look furious and start spouting about not being prepared to take over looking after YOUR kids just to see you have all your time free to start fucking other men...Aaaaand the word 'custody' will never pass his lips again...

DoreenLethal Sun 21-Jun-15 12:03:23

Have you looked into alternative living arrangements? This is no good is it?

He nearly killed all of you by leaving a pie in the oven and passing out.

Food for thought.

AlisonBlunderland Sun 21-Jun-15 12:08:26

I would take the burnt pie and put it on his pillow so that he rolls over face first into it.

goddessofsmallthings Sun 21-Jun-15 14:18:02

EXACTLY what Sylvanians has said.

This selfish tosspot not only blights your life, he puts it - and, unforgivably, those of his dc - at risk.

Go to your council housing office and find out exactly what your situation is with regard to the tenancy/alternative housing for you and the dc.

afreshstartplease Sun 21-Jun-15 14:21:31

Also agreeing with sylvanians

In our 8 months since split xp hasn't even asked for a single over night

He likes to see them for an hour or so here and there

kissmethere Sun 21-Jun-15 16:33:56

That's really the last straw isn't it?? Please realise you're worth more than this and deserve a better life. Your kids too. Time to go.

Janette123 Sun 21-Jun-15 20:04:54

Please get out of this situation as soon as you can, your children are at risk because of this idiot.

Get some legal advice and do it now.

BreadmakerFan Sun 21-Jun-15 20:09:58

SAE has it 100% spot on.

If you stay and your children die in a fire you will get sympathy but what a waste. Get out now.

AnyFucker Sun 21-Jun-15 20:12:26

get your big girl pants on

hereandtherex Sun 21-Jun-15 21:04:58

Why i fuck sake did you shack up with him?

Why oh why in fuck sake did you have kids with him?

LonnyVonnyWilsonFrickett Sun 21-Jun-15 21:08:11

Your local fire service will fit smoke alarms for free. Whatever you decide to do wrt to DP PLEASE call them tomorrow and get them to come and do this.

kittensinmydinner Sun 21-Jun-15 21:14:09

Are you married op ? If so you have more rights than you think....
Time to kick him out. You really think he would look after three kids full time ?? I don't think so

DogWalker75 Mon 22-Jun-15 00:19:47

Hereandthere, that's not helpful! I highly doubt OP knew what she was letting herself in for. Do you honestly think she did?

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