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HOBBIT'S BAR - Still finding it hard to move on .. Part 11

(1000 Posts)
Notlivingwithsemtexhoorah Thu 18-Jun-15 08:21:38

Welcome to Hobbit’s Bar, owned by Hobbit, open to all and run by anyone who wants the job!

This is the place to come if your marriage/relationship has come to an end and you are struggling to come to terms with this. It is a place to vent, swear, ask for advice,swear, relate to others in the same situation, swear, take a break, swear and have a laugh, whatever.

There are people in this bar at all stages of separation – just separated, negotiating, mediation, court, divorced - and all reasons for this, whether it is abuse, general breakdown, financial worries, OW/OM involved, or coming to terms with a new life.

It is a place to come to for support and swear a bit. You are never obliged to give support to others or reply to any posts. It is ALWAYS okay to say SHIT THIS IS HARD and swear alot and interrupt the giggles if you are having a tough time. No apology necessary for swearing. No one will have a go at you for what you are feeling and share on here. Divorce is a rollercoaster, we are all at different stages, so feel free to jump right in, oh and swear a bit more if you like.

Some glossary terms:

1. Jess is our mascot. Owned by Hobbit, she might do requests if there are enough sausages in it for her. Sorry, she's been joined by a pineapple and an Uzi in this 1st post for those who don't like firearms
2. Izzitinis are a revolting cocktail created by Izzie that only she drinks!
3. No 6’s are what we are/were married to, after Hobbit’s Twunts list. Some of us also have “pet” nicknames for our exes
4. KOKO – keep on keeping on (used a lot on here along with SHIT THIS IS HARD)
5. Ignore any exclamation marks posted by Izzie or Roz that might make their comments sounds a bit…dodgy. Something to do with their iPads having a mind of their own!
6. We all listen to WWK aka WellWhoKnew aka Mother who keeps us under control.
7. Random Guys feature on here too

Our theme tune is My Silver Lining

My name is Semtex, 50, married almost 31 years, 2 DSs 26 & one DD 28. One DS has NC with their Dad the other two have been well and truly brainwashed(Thought it was my fault but counsellor says otherwise, so I will believe her). Nisi nearly here on the basis of UB. Been to mediation, waste of time for us as HE IS THE MASTER. Filled in Form E and hopefully he has, now just waiting for the lies to read. Once he moved out he took the opportunity to use my time at work as the best time to take anything of value from the house. Nice. Now everything is locked from the inside including bedrooms etc. My DS is intending to buy him out so we both have somewhere to live and actually I.m not ready to move out as its my home. Ive said before that I don't feel that qualified to give advice that others do as I am a relative newbie and don't have young DC's but on good days hope I can help you raise a smile cos you have all helped me in one way or another. …...

Notlivingwithsemtexhoorah Thu 18-Jun-15 08:29:03

If anyone could do a link to the previous threads I would be muchly appreciative thank you x

Hobbitwife001 Thu 18-Jun-15 09:35:07

Yey! Go semtex
< hides in cupboard to avoid trying to do links>

bobs123 Thu 18-Jun-15 11:21:24

Link to Part 10 here

Well done semtex star

Izzie595 Thu 18-Jun-15 11:53:18

Woo hoo! smile

BravingSpring Thu 18-Jun-15 12:33:16

Checking in.

WellWhoKnew Thu 18-Jun-15 12:34:00

Morning Semtexthelandlady I am having a few days off "wurk" so I shall be gallivanting around the bar as the resident drunken lunatic.

I am feeling free to swear.

Shit! My head hurts - I feckin' drank too much red fookin' wine last night after a long day driving to my nearly not home and a good day at wurk. I am liking wurk more and more every day I go. They've even allowed me a a full week's wurk next week. I can't wait.

Things for WWK to achieve today:

Ring estate agents in Scotland to find a home.
Ring cattery and pick up cats.
Clean fecking house.
Drink tea.
Swear a lot more.

Hobbitwife001 Thu 18-Jun-15 13:39:55

Hey, I plan to join you WWK in a few of your chosen pursuits for today,
1. Drink tea.
2. Swear even more than usual.

I wish I could ring the estate agents, can't just yet, Jess would mightily object to me visiting a cattery, and I ain't cleaning the fecking house, so I'll leave them to you.

I'm so glad ' wurk' is going well , you deserve every good thing, xx

2little2late2change4now Thu 18-Jun-15 13:51:29

Hello all,

I've been quiet. Ex got in touch via email and it set me back a bit so had a few days wallowing and sobbing. I don't want him back but I am just so astounded that he hasn't even asked how his dd is, he truly doesn't care, he has no future plans for contact with her or the baby and it just breaks my heart for my poor children who deserve so much more.
I am KOKO though and staying busy and reminding myself that it's his loss. Getting ready for our little holiday adventure on Saturday. Hoping there's wifi for mn.

Hoping everyone is ok on here

2little2late2change4now Thu 18-Jun-15 13:52:06

Hello all,

I've been quiet. Ex got in touch via email and it set me back a bit so had a few days wallowing and sobbing. I don't want him back but I am just so astounded that he hasn't even asked how his dd is, he truly doesn't care, he has no future plans for contact with her or the baby and it just breaks my heart for my poor children who deserve so much more.
I am KOKO though and staying busy and reminding myself that it's his loss. Getting ready for our little holiday adventure on Saturday. Hoping there's wifi for mn.

Hoping everyone is ok on here

BravingSpring Thu 18-Jun-15 16:22:11

2little He'll regret missing out, that's one thing they all have in common.

Hope you have a nice holiday.

whatyouseeiswhatyouget Thu 18-Jun-15 16:28:53

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

2little2late2change4now Thu 18-Jun-15 17:46:01

Thank you both. I know he will regret this but I don't think it will be until he is an old man and wondering where his life went wrong. Thank you for the ex twat winner award though, I do struggle to understand how anyone can behave this way to their children above everything else. I also have to say I'm so lucky, she's amazing and so good and so much fun and such a happy soul with all this lovely curly hair, it's not like he's running from a difficult child or anything.
I'm in Oxfordshire, all volunteers welcome!! There's only 12 weeks to go now and my birth partner and I are getting quite excited smile she's a wonderful neighbour who's been through breast cancer at 35, no one stronger to help me through this.
No more wallowing for a week, we will have a good holiday even if the grandparents drive me mental sometimes.
I feel as though he's managed to just press delete and erase us.
I think having something new to focus on does help, new home, new job, new baby, whatever it may be. Change can be good x

Notlivingwithsemtexhoorah Thu 18-Jun-15 19:02:52

WWK and Hobbit knew you wouldn't let me down with the foul language, I love it keep it up girls ! off to get pissed a bit then not do any housework or wurk or anything really smile

Notlivingwithsemtexhoorah Thu 18-Jun-15 19:04:08

Oh and by the way, dont tell Izzie you're already posting on the new thread as she's a bit anal about filling up the old one first <runs and hides> smile

bobs123 Thu 18-Jun-15 19:15:03

Now just hold on a momentito semtex I started the last thread and just like Izzie I feel the old thread should be finished too! So before you all go on posting on here, any remarks, inane, sweary, just plain stoopid, should be directed at the other one first to fill it up grin grin grin

too late - she's probably bladdered by now

Notlivingwithsemtexhoorah Thu 18-Jun-15 19:27:43

Bobs I'm helping you fill up the old one love

AccordingtoMe Thu 18-Jun-15 19:31:07

Nicely done Semtex (and NOT Sextex ofc) blush

2little you are amazingly strong, must be so scared but Im glad you are going to have someone there for you flowers

Notlivingwithsemtexhoorah Thu 18-Jun-15 19:33:57

Bobs 14 come on now I've run out of ideas

AccordingtoMe Thu 18-Jun-15 19:39:40

Help arrived! grin

Notlivingwithsemtexhoorah Thu 18-Jun-15 19:40:46

Well done according and Bobs phew

AccordingtoMe Thu 18-Jun-15 19:40:53

Deserves a repost as Bobs liked it

To ALL the twunts!

bobs123 Thu 18-Jun-15 19:41:05

All done now - thanks According and semtex wipes brow Izzie won't notice hmm

bobs123 Thu 18-Jun-15 19:41:31

Tee-hee thank you smile

AccordingtoMe Thu 18-Jun-15 19:41:39

LOL wink

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