Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.


(4 Posts)
NatHun90 Sat 13-Jun-15 16:27:10

I'd really appreciate some advice really, about my sister. I am really worried about her but don't know what to do or who to turn too. I believe she is being mentally abused by her boyfriend and am not sure if he is going to start physically abusing her too. She moved in with him dive months ago after only knowing gin forn3/4 weeks. She no longer she's any members of the family and only talks to me when he is at work. They only have one key to the one bedroom flats they are staying in with a women they don't know! She only contacts me when she wants money. When she does ring me and he is there he is always shouting at her in the background to stop talking to me. As she doesn't work at the moment she has no money of her own, her boyfriend controls his money she never see any of it, I think he is working on the sly but I don't know for sure. has also just found out she is two months pregnant with his child, he told her today that if she ever tries to leave or goes to see me or our dad then he will take the baby off her and move away where she wont ever be able to see the child again. On Wednesday she rang me in tears saying she wanted to leave Ben, as he was heartless and didn't care about her or the baby. He wasn't at home at this point. I told her id send her money but she was overdrawn in her bank so I could I then told her to go to the tram stop I would meet her there and get her (as u don't drive I had to get the tram) ingot half way on the tram and she rang in tears saying Bens coming to get me I'm going back. I rang her and she was still on tears saying she wanted to go back and sort things out with him for the sake of the child. She has only just given me an address for her. He also keeps getting things like phones and credit cards in her name running up debt and she's getting in trouble for it.

I just don't know what to do or say. I've told her she can stay with me and that he can not take the baby off her but she wont listen, I asked her why she was still with him and she said, cause I'm not having him take my baby off me!

BeccaMumsnet (MNHQ) Tue 16-Jun-15 11:59:49

Hi NatHun90 - we're going to move your most to a more appropriate topic so you can get the best possible advice.

All the best flowers

pocketsaviour Tue 16-Jun-15 14:50:12

You need to ask MNHQ to edit your post to remove the name.

It's a very difficult situation. Do you think she would consider ringing Women's Aid? They would be able to help her move out and if necessary, move away.

pocketsaviour Tue 16-Jun-15 14:51:10

BTW a lot of abusers say "I'll take the baby off you" as a threat - it's very very rarely followed through because they would actually be horrified at the thought of having to look after a child! It's just another tool to control the victim with.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now