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No friends, no hobbies, no life!

(11 Posts)
havehope Mon 04-May-15 14:56:13

Not really sure where to post this.

I have no hobbies, no interests and very few friends, but they all work.
I have two children, the youngest will be starting reception in September.
I would love to make new friends but don't know how. I would like new interests but don't know what. I don't work, but am looking for a job. The time i have to myself is very limited to just two hours in the morning when LO is in nursery. Once I pick my eldest up from school we just go home. So I don't see anyone after 4pm.

This has been my life for a while now and I don't know how to break the cycle. I have lost all of my social skills and feel I have nothing to offer so if anyone did start talking to me I would wonder why. I am desperately looking for a job which I hope will bring me out of my shell. I have no family near where I am. I don't know anyone who would babysit either. Not that I have the money to go out!

Does anyone else feel this way? How do I change things?

geekymommy Mon 04-May-15 15:01:34

Well, in my experience, it's hard to have hobbies, interests, or friends when you don't have much time to yourself. Don't be down on yourself for that.

sandysunshine Mon 04-May-15 15:52:58

what about finding a course to go on? some places provide free child spaces. i volunteered with homestart when mine were little and it was a great way to meet other mums in the same situation. some of my friends i met through my children, once we got talking we could talk for hrs about the things we had in common mainly kids funny little ways our labours and pregnancies. befriended other mums will keep you sane x

Lifecanonlygetbetter Mon 04-May-15 17:25:42

What about starting to rebuild your self confidence by doing some volunteering? Visiting older people is one way to start, and volunteering is a good way to get references. Going into school to listen to children reading is also relatively stress free, and I know a lot of people who used this as a way into becoming a TA.

fairyelephantswellies Mon 04-May-15 17:35:50

I feel the same. DC 2 and 3 start reception in September. It's been so long since I worked I don't know how I'd get on in a work environment... sometimes I try and have a conversation and just can't express myself properly. I thought I'd volunteer at school, they always seem to need people to read with the children.

havehope Mon 04-May-15 18:48:31

Thank you for all your replies.

I have looked at volunteering but everywhere I have found expects a commitment of 9am-1pm. My daughter is in nursery 9- 11.30.

I have the same timing issues with courses. The adult ed don't help toeards childcare.

The only other volunteer position that fits in with me is being a lone worker doing filing, so that's not brilliant really.

I have asked at the school and they don't need anyone at the moment, plus they have a waiting list.

I don't really know what else to do. I feel I am stuck until September or until I get a job which I really hope will be before then.

2fedup Mon 04-May-15 18:54:56

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NorahDentressangle Mon 04-May-15 18:57:35

There must be something on in that 2 hour space. I would think some, but not all, classes will allow you to arrive a bit late or leave a bit early.

Pilates/yoga/patchwork whatever have a look in the local library, local paper, online. We have some classes listed in the county council website here.

hereandtherex Mon 04-May-15 19:17:00

Yep. Im like that. Its called having (young) children.

It improves as they get older and go to school.

In the odd couple of hours I got I used to go for a walk, have a nap, listen to play on the radio. No point trying to fit in something more complex and involved.

NerrSnerr Mon 04-May-15 19:19:18

What about your daughter doing some kind of sport/ activity after school. It's something you could get involved in with teaching/ coaching once your youngest is old enough to join in?

comedancing Mon 04-May-15 20:16:06

What about a gym class in the morning .. .. Tennis lessons..you might meet some mom whose child is going to reception with your dd and ye could do something together in the morning .. .. There may be moms heading off walking together as soon as they drop their little one. It will get easier but try everything don't rule anything out..so if you see a notice for something starting in the mornings just do it even if it's something you never imagined doing. One thing leads to another

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