I'm 27 and I'm in a very successful career. I have a partner, but I rarely see him due to his and my work (both work in Europe regularly, but not together...we therefore see each other every few weeks, and briefly). But, my DP isn't the problem. I'm not sure he is 'the one,' but that's not why I feel this way. I just feel utterly lost.
In my early twenties, I had such a passion for life. Even after uni, when applying for the role I have now, I was enthusiastic, I could take knockbacks (and there were many!). I went through a heartbreak and it was soul destroying, but I got through it. I worked hard to re-build my life. I was excited about things...I saw a purpose in all that I did, I was positive and resilient.
Now...things have changed. I feel like my job is pointless in the sense that it makes money but that's it...it doesn't benefit anyone, really. There's no real purpose to it, in my eyes. I am disillusioned with it. I feel like I lost a few friends along the way when trying hard to get into this career. That's caused some bitterness on my part (and my old friends, possibly). I don't have any interests in things. I try. I have been to language classes, art classes, the gym etc. But I don't actually enjoy doing these things...I often feel as if I'm 'watching' myself...not really living, just going through the motions. I also constantly feel like I don't cope well with not seeing my partner, I get anxious about it and that's out of character for me.
I also used to be quite funny (don't mean that in an arrogant way!), I could make people laugh and I took pride in my appearance. I used to LOVE going to the make up counter in Boots, and I would be forever browsing online for new outfits. A dinner out with a friend, DP, anyone, would be really special to me and I would go all out and really look forward to the occasion.
I've always been a worrier, but even my worries have disappeared into just a general feeling of anxiety. I can't remember the last time I felt excited about the future in any way, shape or form. And I have tried so hard to make the effort, I really have. I don't think I am depressed. I have been to see my GP and he said perhaps I was stressed. I don't feel stressed, I just feel empty. It sort of feels like I am in a mid-life crisis, and life is passing me by.
Any advice would be so much appreciated.
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
I'm 27 and I don't know how or what makes me happy anymore, I don't know how to live
yoursewr · 21/04/2015 20:30
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