So I started a thread a month or so ago about how miserable I was with my DP and I wanted to finish it for good. I did that evening then sadly the following day my dd told me she had been raped multiple times by a lad out at her fathers. She asked for my dp to be with us when she spoke to the police.
Since then the last four weeks have been a blur. A horrible nightmare of police, interviews, musicals etc etc. And my partner has been about as normal. Because as much as I don't want to be with him, my dd wanted him around. He's been so lovely with my dd, I found myself softening towards him.
Now though, I want him gone. I'm not in a good way. The kids have been away for a few days with their father and I have pretty much been in bed. I'm very depressed. I'm on meds though, was anyways and trying to motivate myself. The kids coming home tomorrow will get me going too.
My dp didn't spend New Year's Eve with me. I just wanted a quiet night in but he wanted to spend it with his friend who is a big drug user and will no doubt have been sticking some down his neck last night.
It's now half five and I tried to call him. Didn't really want to but his phone was off anyways. Obviously has no intentions of seeing me on ny day either.
After Christmas he took me away for a few days to a nearby town. There was a poker tournament he wanted to play in. He also said we would go to the cinema, and sales shopping. Of which we did neither. We did have some nice meals. But basically I just hung around for two days whilst he played in his tournament.
And now he can't even be bothered to spend any time with me at new year. Maybe I wouldn't be so bothered if I wasn't feeling so low and vulnerable right now. But I am bothered and I just want him gone now.
I'm probably being unreasonable but I do think he contributes to my unhappiness and I don't want another year like the two ive just had.
I know it's a shit thing to do, to finish with someone on ny day and I do feel guilty because he was there for my dd. But I don't think I can go any more months of being with this man.
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And here I am again. Sorry.
7 replies
Celestria · 01/01/2015 17:46
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