So we split up on Christmas Eve, it was a brief intense relationship. I love him and I can't stop thinking about him, it was so good when it was good. He's not too bothered it seems but I seem incapable of retaining my dignity and so keep messaging him. I have two young children and it's so hard trying to keep a happy face on. How do I get over this :-(
Time, time and more time. Keep busy. Keep a journal and write all your thoughts down. Delete his number and all message etc so you cannot retrieve deleted number. Do you really love him or was it more lust/obsession? You will get through this but only if you help yourself as well.
Find something to do - anything that will keep your hands busy and away from your phone. I used to write a list for myself of all the little jobs that needed doing that I never seemed to get round to - things like clearing out the junk drawer in the kitchen, sewing loose buttons on etc. Anything to act as a distraction. You will just torture yourself by sending messages and hoping for a reply. But it does take time.
We had booked a holiday and he is now going with someone else. I need to get the money back hopefully. I want him to hurt like I do - that's pretty bad isn't it. He's just so unfeeling when we were really close.
Really fairy? haven't looked yet. I spent a lot on him for Christmas and had already given it to him before this. Just thinking how lonely I am makes me want to cry, yet I have two beautiful kids and should be happy.
Has been a lifesaver for me. You have my FULL SYMPATHY - it is awful but you CAN DO IT. Same behaviour = same results. He can't miss you while you are still contacting him and if he doesn't then it is HIS LOSS and you need to move on, with your self esteem in tact. Easier said than done, I know - it took me six months before i realised my self esteem meant more to me than a few breadcrumb texts from a loser. GOOD LOOK TO YOU x
OP you are going through a difficult time. Don't be hard on yourself. It would be strange if you didn't care. It can be very very painful and I have been where you are now.
My DC were very young at the time and I leaned on them because they loved me. I would snuggle up beside them and watch films, play games and take them out. The love they gave me unconditionally helped me enormously.
The pain was still there but trying to focus on them really helped. Your DC love you and they need you. You will get over the pain. It is really hard so just accept that your feelings are completely normal. I know you feel alone but there are strangers all around the world going through the same as you right at this moment. I think it is tougher to experience this loss at Christmas.
Tell yourself that you love yourself and accept the pain as normal. You will still feel the pain but comfort yourself, be your own best friend. Try not to panic. Statistically you stand a very good chance of getting through this and moving on to other new experiences. Just accept that it is over and allow yourself to be a little bit excited about finding someone new in the future. It already happened to you and it is likely that it will happen again.
If you can't face deleting his number just now turn off your phone to give yourself a break. When I was going through this I couldn't face deleting his number. One of my friends deleted it for me and although it was agony it started the process of me moving on ever so slightly. Take care of yourself.
I know this feeling and I promise you it does get so much better, but by texting him you are only prolonging the agony. There is always someone here to speak to you, no matter what time of day. Take care, OP
Thank you all for the support. Before I met him I was so strong and happy on my own and now I feel pathetic and weak. I wonder how many times a person can go through this before they give up? I fell for him completely.
I think it's just so hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel we will get there hopefully soon. Am 25 weeks pregnant to I've never in my life felt this bad. Just crazy how someone can go from loving you to not at all that just makes it harder trying to get your head around x
I've moved in with my mam for a little bit. We finished 12 days ago my mam doesn't no the full situation I have tryed to speak to my ex he's the only person I feel like i can talk to. But he's always to busy.. He's said he will support me but I've had hospital appointments last week and he didn't come. I've been messaging him again today! I wish I could just cut all ties with him because this is going to make me really ill. As am struggling to eat as it is. Ahhh sick of feeling like this x