DH and I have been TTC a fair while, and got a sticky one at the end of August. We had been open to friends who asked if we were wanting a sibling for dc1, so people knew we were trying.
I preferred to keep our news to ourselves until the anomaly scan at 20 weeks, telling people only if things were good then. I'm not showing under winter clothes so no one had guessed.
My 'friend' lives in another country, so I don't actually see her in person, but we email a lot, Skype, have loads in common. She considers me her best (pretty much only) friend. Her initial reaction when I told her was as one would hope : congratulations, wow, really happy for you etc.
I'm now reeling from the email she sent me two days after we told her.
"If it were me, and I got pregnant after trying for so long, I would have told you the day I learned I was expecting. I can't imagine keeping such momentous news from you. What would possess me to withhold it from you, I can't imagine. For 4 months to boot. Me thinking, shame they haven't gotten pregnant yet, and for 4 months or so, you've been pregnant all along! Now I've had some time for it to settle in, I think our "friendship" is bullshit. Makes me wonder what other major life events or things you are withholding from me. If you can keep this from me, imagine what else you can withhold from me! So you might have had a miscarriage and not even told me? You might have had to decide to terminate your pregnancy and not shared that with me? Wooooowwwwwww"
I replied briefly saying I'm sorry she felt like that, but that I had wanted to have our privacy for a while, and wait for the anomaly scan, as is quite normal, I hope she understood and could just be happy for me.
She replied:
"No. I don't understand at all. Glad you are happy."
This was yesterday, and I haven't replied.
Should I just ignore til she talks some sense into herself and apologises, or what? I'm really annoyed she has pissed on my parade. This is such a happy time for DH and me (and dc1), and she's gone and reacted like this. She has three children, no conception issues, so it's nothing to do with anything like that. She's just hacked off I didn't tell her straight away. She is being unreasonable, right?
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
Shocked by 'friend's reaction to my happy news. How to respond. If at all!
UptownFunk · 11/12/2014 20:13
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