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Strange email on DH's account

(142 Posts)
mynameisearl1 Fri 28-Nov-14 23:02:04

I logged onto DH's email today to check something and I found an email from his female work colleague. It says:
Hi X. Sorry to bother you again but I really need talk to you. Could we chat one evening on FB? Just catch me when you see me logged on. Please do find time and do not ignore me, I know you might feel uncomfortable or so but please, you're a big boy so surely you can talk to me for a while. I really start feeling like an idiot for getting in touch with you. You have to admit that it happens once in a blue moon but even then you seem just not to give a fuck about it. I thought we were friends, but friends should respect each other, shouldn't they?
I am not any threat to you and you know it, I just need to clear up my mind. So please do find some time, I really do not want to lose my respect for you. Hope you and your family are all OK x

He hasn't replied to that message. I looked for other emials from her and found nothing, however her contact is saved into contacts book.

Is it just me being suspicious or is this message weird? I dont know that woman, I only know they worked together at his old workplace. My DH is usually very open about any social media contact, he hasn't password on his phone, I can easily access his FB or email. We have a good and healthy relationship ... or do I only think so?

Only1scoop Fri 28-Nov-14 23:06:33

Agree very strange has he read it can you tell!

Only1scoop Fri 28-Nov-14 23:06:59


Fmlgirl Fri 28-Nov-14 23:07:49

Well obviously they had something in the past (it appears to be quite a while back) and she sporadically tries to get in touch with him.

FiftyShadesofScreeeeeeeam Fri 28-Nov-14 23:08:03

That is weird. I can't think of what the context could be.

JeffreyGartnerEatsWell Fri 28-Nov-14 23:08:10

he has done something that has made her lose respect for him and he either couldn't care less if she's lost all respect for him, or ........ it's just too awkward to discuss. it sounds like she wants to think well of him, wants to hear his 'side'.

it could be anything, it could be he lied to a client to get business and compromised his integrity in a business kind of way {or is that naive?} but then again he could have made a pass at her sister or flat mate .......... or maybe he just sold her up the river at work. Or talked disparagingly about her when she thought they were friends.

ArgyMargy Fri 28-Nov-14 23:08:31

Well it does read as though they have had some kind of inappropriate encounter(s)...

Hassled Fri 28-Nov-14 23:09:47

I think she's probably embarrassed herself/made a clumsy pass and your DH has brushed her off. There's a desperation to the tone of the email - he's clearly ignored her before now.

makeitabetterplace Fri 28-Nov-14 23:10:33

'It happens once in a blue moon' would upset me - does she mean contacting him or something between them? She sounds unhinged and bananas. I wonder why he didn't mention it. This would upset me too OP.

NomorepepperpigPLEASE Fri 28-Nov-14 23:11:59

Second argy . He is probably shitting himself now as she is stalking him

Only1scoop Fri 28-Nov-14 23:12:54

She sounds very eager to get in touch doesn't she....

Windywinston Fri 28-Nov-14 23:13:01

There's only one way to find out and that's to ask him. Or, check his FB and phone first. Personally I'd just ask him. It sounds dodgy, but he might not have done anything

MommyBird Fri 28-Nov-14 23:13:03

She sounds a bit..loony.

RJnomore Fri 28-Nov-14 23:13:32

My honest read of that?

I'm not a suspicious type but to me, that's a woman who has had something happen that shouldn't ŵith a man she thought was a friend, and is now devastated that he is ignoring her and she has lost his friendship.

And sorry op but it reads to me like he's taken advantage and now doesn't even have the balls to deal with it.

I am very easy going, MN never ceases to amaze me with what people think means an affair, but that's very clear to me.

Heyho111 Fri 28-Nov-14 23:14:53

The fact that she said she hoped his family are ok , that he has not deleted the email and that all access to media stuff is open to you , I would be surprised if it was sinister.
It reads odd but because there isn't an obvious theme to everyone else but them. That makes us think it's dodgy when it prob isn't. They way have clashed in work etc. fallen out of friendship.
I'd ask him what it's about as you have a good relationship. That way you can put worries to bed.

Hassled Fri 28-Nov-14 23:16:00

I don't read it as the DH having done anything dodgy - I read it as her trying to get out of an awkward hole.

It could all be work-related, of course. Did one of them steal the other's clients?

Botanicbaby Fri 28-Nov-14 23:16:58

funny how you rarely hear of men as being 'unhinged and bananas', eh?

anyway, to me it sounds like something happened between them in the past (her comment 'i am not any threat to you' reads more like 'i am not any threat to the status quo/your family life'). But she wants to get something straight in her head, maybe he has been stringing her along/fed her some BS or something.

Of course, I could be completely wrong.

NewEraNewMindset Fri 28-Nov-14 23:19:00

Hmm I've read it twice and have to agree that it reads like they have been intimate in the past and she can't move past it. It's easy to say 'let's be friends' but it sounds as though she is desperate for their still to be communication and your OH wants no part it in.

Is there a chance they could have had a thing before he met you?

makeitabetterplace Fri 28-Nov-14 23:19:09

Of course men can be unhinged and bananas. What an odd response.

Flimflammer Fri 28-Nov-14 23:20:33

I read that as her wanting much more than him, and reading far too much into something that hasn't even happened. And I am the most suspicious mountain out of a molehill maker Evah.

jasper Fri 28-Nov-14 23:34:22

ask him or log on to his FB and start chatting

jasper Fri 28-Nov-14 23:34:44

I was kidding about FB

SquidgyMaltLoaf Fri 28-Nov-14 23:50:08

Sounds to me like she has feelings for him, told him, and he gave her the brush off and is now avoiding her.

Tobyjugg Sat 29-Nov-14 00:17:56

Reads to me as if she made a pass and he refused her. Now she's worried about how it will affect their work relationship. I mean, do OWs really ask after their lover's family?

PlantsAndFlowers Sat 29-Nov-14 00:26:48

If it wasn't dodgy why would he ignore it? I think 'hope you and your family are OK' is some kind of subtle threat.

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