Does anyone do this?? STBXH asked if his new(ish) gf could come to parents evening with us next time. I said it was fine, but I think I only said it because I was so surprised by his request! I don't think she should come, they are our children not hers. Does anyone's new DP come with them to parents evening?? I wouldn't dream of taking mine, but maybe that's just me.
No! My ex and I both live with new partners and still would not dream of this. He can feed it back to her after. So inappropriate. Call him and tell him that on reflection it would be uncomfortable and the discussions should be between the teacher and the two of you. Or he can get his own appointment and take her.
My dd's best friend's mother brings her boyfriend along to her dd's parents evenings but they announced they were getting married after about a month and she introduces her boyfriends children as her daughter's brother and sister. It all seems a bit soon and overfamiliar to me. Friend calls the boyfriend "dad" too. In fact the boyfriend manages to show up at even more school events than my dh manages to get to. Do your children want her at the parents evenings?
I would say no, parents evenings are for parents. We frequently have me, my DP exH his DP at school events (all sat together in a row!). but neither of us would dream of bringing our partner to parents evening
I am in a similar position as the non-parent. I wouldn't expect to go unless neither of the actual parents couldn't attend and I could. (And frankly I loath going for my own kids as it is). My ex has never attended one, and I would ask my DP to go if I couldn't.
I think it depends on whether non-parent is doing homework, projects, cake baking and all that jazz. If she is planning on being fully involved in all that, then fair enough.
No. I think it's really over-stepping (and - if its not your child, boring!) I think she must be daft if she wants to go and he is quite needy if he wants her there. And that's what some teachers will think too.
I don't mind her going to the school events - in fact because of work I'm missing the fair and the Xmas concert so doubtless she'll be going. But I thought parents evening was a step too far! She lives in "our" house and has done for nearly a year, but still...
Ah, so there is a difficult back-story here too. I originally put he must be a 'twat' and then changed it to 'needy'. - It sounds like your ex is a twat. I'm sorry. Still, this one isn't worth fighting about I reckon.
However, my dh is ds stepdad and he comes to parents evening, but only if ds dad can't make it (he lives far away).
But, ds lives with us, he's with dh all the time, dh helps him with school work etc, so that's not odd. I would be fine with it if ds lived with exh and he took his dw along if I couldn't make it, but I'd be a bit if it was a new girlfriend who didn't live with ds.
Speaking as a teacher, this is not normal. Sometimes partners of parents come along but this is usually because the other parent (usually the dad) just isn't part of the child's life anymore. I've never, in fifteen years, had three 'parents' show up to parents evening. I can imagine it mig be useful if a child had very specific special needs and spent time living with both sets of parents and the new partner needed professional advice about how to best support that child. Otherwise it is just weird.
However, you've said yes now and if you turn round and say no it might cause problems between you all. If you're able to do this then I would as a goodwill gesture. I guess it shows good willing on her part to be fully involved where she can?
One of ds's friends has a complicated family where the split up is so amicable that nobody can really understand why I happened- he effectively now has 4 parents and 6 younger siblings, and divides his time equally between their houses. It's always interesting to see what combination of parents turns up at parents evening- I have seen anything from 1 to all four! But it is very unusual- and the 4 parent evening was definitely a bit odd.........