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PUA's

(32 Posts)
rockup Mon 24-Nov-14 16:09:34

THere have been sone really interesting articles on The Guardian about this following the decision to prevent Julian Blanc coming into the country. Whilst he is clearly an idious character, it does seem like this raises some uncomfortable questions about men and womens sexual interaction.

SunshineBossaNova Mon 24-Nov-14 16:27:29

Julien Blanc advocated using violence and coercion against women. It works for rapists.

What do you think rockup?

rockup Mon 24-Nov-14 16:33:04

Blanc does advocate that hence why he was prohibited from entering the country. Apparently there is a wider 'community' of men that teach this pick up stuff that does not, although what they do teach is highly controversial.

Hatespiders Mon 24-Nov-14 16:36:57

He's an odious creep. Apparently he was criticised for, among other things, advocating seizing women by their throats to subdue them (demonstrating this move in photos!). He tried to backtrack by saying he wasn't strangling them, just 'holding' them by the neck' !!!!! He also says that Japanese women can be made to deliver a blowjob by thrusting their heads into your lap.
Charming.
I'm very proud that he was banned from entering UK. The Aussies sensibly chucked him out unceremoniously when it became apparent how evil he is.
Lowlife.

King1982 Mon 24-Nov-14 16:41:39

I watched a documentary on PUA's a lot of it was very tragic. It seemed to involve a great deal of psychology of interaction, promoting confidence, and just being straight forward (eg asking straight out for numbers). It was mainly pub psych and a way to make money from their students.
It was similar to some stuff you hear on here, like withholding contact (texts/calls), playing hard to get. I imagine a laddy version of 'the rules' I haven't read them though.

Regarding this blanc bell end. He seemed to be preaching hatred and using hateful language.

Purplelolly2000 Mon 24-Nov-14 16:46:42

One of my ex's 'held me by the neck' once. He then proceeded to 'place his fist into my face'. Luckily for me he missed and instead 'inserted a large hole' into the wall instead. Violence against women, real or perceived, is NEVER justified under any circumstances and I for one, am proud that the UK has done the sensible thing and banned this disgusting low-life.

SunshineBossaNova Mon 24-Nov-14 16:47:30

I know that what they preach is controversial, I was interested in your opinion.

What I've read over the years is that these PUA advocate 'negging' - (insulting women to get a reaction) and ignoring their physical boundaries.

Both of which are manipulative and coercive. Some degrees less than Blanc, but still unpleasant.

We don't know for sure these tactics work; the men paying £££ for these sessions seem to think they do. However, they are likely to work to some degree in a world that teaches women that they deserve to have their boundaries trampled and be 'judged' by random strangers.

Their theories also rely on the idea that men 'deserve' sex from random women - that only if they use tools x, y and z women will be fooled into fucking them. Almost as if women were not fully autonomous beings, or even human. Walking sex-toys, if you will.

It's patriarchy writ large, frankly.

BruceSpringClean Mon 24-Nov-14 16:48:07

Banning Julien Blanc is probably the first good thing this government has done.

Between this, Dapper Laughs getting cancelled, and Ched Evans not getting a contract to play at Sheffield again, it's been a good few months for smashing the patriarchy. Which makes a nice change.

rockup Mon 24-Nov-14 16:54:59

It can be manupulative and I have no doubt that much of what it is about is morally dubious. It is interesting that its somewhat countercultural to the idea of 'just be yourself' and to be a nice guy.

GarlicNovember Mon 24-Nov-14 23:20:07

I joined the forum for a while, I was curious grin It's an odd mixture of rousing cheers & confidence-building with good old misogyny. A lot of the social psychology is sound as far as I can see. Unfortunately the emphasis is very much on using women; the men who get the most points/stars/whatever the fuck they get are those who manage to cocklodge off one stunning & delightful woman after another. A lot of lip service was paid to the guys who really just want to meet a nice woman and fall in love but, it seemed to me, they were consistently edged towards 'no lay, no play,' treating women as disposables.

It's all sales techniques and manipulation. OK for shagging around and having a laugh, but unhealthy from a relationship point of view. I never saw any of the gurus advocating violence but, then, it was a few years ago and maybe it's got worse.

myfriendflickadee Mon 24-Nov-14 23:35:18

Oh, which forum did you join, GarlicNovember?

GarlicNovember Mon 24-Nov-14 23:40:13

I was dreading someone asking that! If you're still interested tomorrow, I'll have a look through my Registrations folder and see if it's still there smile

meditrina Mon 24-Nov-14 23:46:03

Negging! Despite many reservations about how TBBT depicts things, one time it did well was when it mocked negging:

Howard: Mock me if you will, but it works. You show up at a club in something distinctive, scope out your target and toss out some negs.

Raj: What are negs?

Howard: A neg is a negative compliment that throws a pretty woman off her game, like “Normally, I’m not turned on by big teeth, but on you, they work.” I’ve got a whole list of ‘em. Who wants to be my wingman?

Leonard: You’re not gonna need wingman, you’re gonna need a paramedic.

Penny (entering): Howard, your scooter’s blocking my car. Aw, did you get pinkeye again?

Howard: Step one, she notices the eye patch. May I say, Penny, not a lot of women could look as hot as you do with such greasy hair? (She reaches out, pulls his eye patch away from his face, then lets go allowing the elastic to spring it back into place.)

Penny: Yeah, just move your stupid scooter before I pick it up and throw it in the dumpster.

MadeMan Mon 24-Nov-14 23:47:03

People will always want to learn how they can get sex/find a partner easily and pick up artists such as Neil Strauss and Arden Leigh will be there to make loads of money from it.

Some PUA's are worse than others, but it's all about them making money from people; same as any supposedly feel good, self help seminars.

GarlicNovember Mon 24-Nov-14 23:48:01

Oh, that was easy. It seems I'm still getting motivating emails from them. pick-up-artist-forum.com/ Actually, the most recent email was all about how the FBI trains agents to detect micro-expressions, promised to show me how to "detect what womens' emotional state was, how they felt about you, and when to turn up the escalation without them having to say ANYTHING?" and gave me a link, which went to this not very confidence-inspiring £5.95 tutorial that will help me get women to BANG ME RIGHT NOW.

Yeah. Sure it will wink

MadeMan Mon 24-Nov-14 23:51:45

If you work at preaching what people want to hear, then you will make money.

Go to a third world country and preach religion, or come to the West and preach about picking up people for sex.

It's all about money.

GarlicNovember Tue 25-Nov-14 00:11:46

It's a shame, really. A lot of what they teach is useful - just tragically misdirected! No man who views women as prey is going to get himself the loved-up, long-term relationship he probably wanted when he signed up for this shit.

MadeMan Tue 25-Nov-14 00:24:16

The problem I have with the PUA stuff is that women are going to start thinking that all men are using tricks on them and they'll start looking out for Obi-Wan Kenobi type Jedi mind control being used on them all the time.

Some of the so-called methods like 'negging' (because hot women apparently never get dissed about their appearance hmm ) seem a bit old hat now and cheesy; I can't imagine it being long before women see this for what it is and it'll be useless.

AWholeLottaNosy Tue 25-Nov-14 00:31:19

I read a bit of 'The Game' in a bookshop the other day. It was one of the most depressing, misogynistic books I had ever read. I found it quite chilling actually and could see how the logical extension of his philosophy could easily end up in the killing of women as they won't 'put out' for these men. Just nasty.

MadeMan Tue 25-Nov-14 00:41:42

I'd like to see a club full of newly trained PUA men all using the same negging techniques on the women in there and then seeing the results. Surely a bunch of Ralphed-up shirted blokes out on the pull going round to all the fit birds and spouting crap like, "Hey darling, I'd shag you if your hair wasn't such a f*cking mess!" would result in a mass face slapping riot.

AnyFucker Tue 25-Nov-14 00:49:32

Has anybody known these "techniques" to actually work ? smile

MadeMan Tue 25-Nov-14 00:52:54

I am crap with women so I wouldn't know; I'm just bitter that these PUA's are getting some.

AnyFucker Tue 25-Nov-14 00:58:25

How do you know they are "getting some" ? Do you think dickheads like this tell the truth about that ?

Darkesteyes Tue 25-Nov-14 01:42:25

For PUAs everywhere.

Pink U and Ur Hand. grin

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YUtHjOvPKT0

MysteryMan1 Tue 25-Nov-14 08:07:34

I have read some of the books etc. This guy seems like a twat-PUAs do not advocate violence. It's mainly about how to pick up women in bars, clubs etc.

A lot of it is absolute rubbish but it is to do with an element of psychology in terms of getting someone to be attracted to you. Of course after the first date, most will see right through it...

I believe Russell Brand and David Walliams follow it.

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