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What do you think about this text?

(66 Posts)
notespeller Wed 19-Nov-14 07:12:19

I sent a message to someone I've been seeing after he was being a bit reticent to say - well maybe we should stop seeing each other. I hoped he would be all like "no way" etc etc

He actually wrote:- I think you are amazing in every way and I am seriously and honestly telling you we have a lot of love in our relationship. I only want you to be happy and successful and I really am your biggest supporter and think you are amazing and I know that will NEVER change xx

This means fuck off doesn't it?

quirkycutekitch Wed 19-Nov-14 07:13:34

Sounds very over the top to me!

EhricLovesTheBhrothers Wed 19-Nov-14 07:14:24

Pretty much. You shouldn't have sent the first text, it was manipulative. His response is a bit over the top and gushing but basically the brush off, sorry.

Bowchickawowow Wed 19-Nov-14 07:14:50

Yes, in a fairly bazonkas way.

NorwaySpruce Wed 19-Nov-14 07:15:58

It suggests the two of you don't know each other very well.

You send teenagery game-playing texts, and they send replies that make them sound like a stalkery Mills & Boon fan.

I'd go with walking away myself.

davejudgement Wed 19-Nov-14 07:59:19

you should have asked him outright; Do you want to continue this relationship?

Let it be a lesson in plain speaking and being upfront.

You could always send another stating you were being petulant and ask again as above.

WildBillfemale Wed 19-Nov-14 08:12:58

So you sent a text saying you should end the relationship even though you wanted to carry on seeing him and wanted him to reply protesting not to end it??!!


TheHermitCrab Wed 19-Nov-14 09:23:57

You basically sent a text to "test" him. Manipulative and probably confused the hell out of him.

Why do adults play such games? If you had just been straight you wouldn't be trying to figure out such cryptic texts and what they mean....

CogitoErgoSometimes Wed 19-Nov-14 09:43:35

I'm not a fan of making big relationship changes via text but would interpret what came back in response as 'it's been nice knowing you... have a great life'.

makeitabetterplace Wed 19-Nov-14 09:45:28

You've dumped him and he's sent you a lovely reply. You were stupid if you want to be with him. I think he's had a lucky escape.

Tobyjugg Wed 19-Nov-14 10:03:50

That's "Goodbye" dressed up, he thinks, so as not to hurt your feelings.

notespeller Wed 19-Nov-14 11:07:39

yes I admit I was hoping he'd protest but I feel he was holding back a bit (or a lot really) so I suppose I just said it before he did and gave him an easy out. I suppose I should have just asked him outright if he wanted to continue the relationship but I know he would have said yes and really he wasn't giving me what I wanted. I do feel really really upset though I really do.

I know I can't make him want me though if he doesn't.

TheHermitCrab Wed 19-Nov-14 11:20:39

If you knew asking him outright would get you a yes what more do you want?

Surely you know sending a manipulative message (and approaching the subject via text) to guide him into a certain answer is daft?

What's wrong with just seeing how things progress if everything was going well?

Twinklestein Wed 19-Nov-14 11:26:03

I don't think your message was manipulative, it's perfectly reasonable to ask
'Maybe we should stop seeing each other' rather than 'Would you like to dump me?'.

I wouldn't be doing it by text, but then I hate texting.

Twinklestein Wed 19-Nov-14 11:27:06

It wasn't going well TheHermitCrab that was rather the point.

Buttercupup Wed 19-Nov-14 11:27:16

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CogitoErgoSometimes Wed 19-Nov-14 11:41:10

For another time..... don't place your future in the hands of someone else. If it's not working, if you think someone's holding back, have the courage to end it rather than texting for compliments, trying to force some affection out of them, or pathetically asking them if they want to continue. You get nowhere being weak in a relationship

Bedouin Wed 19-Nov-14 11:43:54

Cogito very sage advice.

russellgrantschin Wed 19-Nov-14 11:53:55

I saw his answer as positive. Maybe I am completely deluded.

yoursinglemumsndadsdate Wed 19-Nov-14 12:04:09

I've found that texting is a mischief maker. Sometimes we text before our brains can catch up and figure out the consequences. Having said that this guy is having trouble saying 'yes' to your question.

Or is he double bluffing? Meaning wants you to think - he's too nice and change your mind about breaking up?

vdbfamily Wed 19-Nov-14 12:18:51

I met my DH online. In the early stages of meeting up I got an email suggesting he thought we were incompatible and I sent a reply which was very similar to the one you got. I basically said I cared about him and thought we would be great together but if he didn't feel the same,I wished him all the best with his life and hoped he would find someone who made him happy. I read your boyfriends reply as positive. I think you need to see him and talk face to face as emails and texts can be totally misconstrued.

yoursinglemumsndadsdate Wed 19-Nov-14 12:22:35

Agree with vdbfamily's post. Don't mean to be nosey but do let us know what happens..

MamaMed Wed 19-Nov-14 12:25:54

I read it as positive too. I thought he was giving you some space to think over it.

Madamecastafiore Wed 19-Nov-14 12:29:09

If a man sent me that text I'd think he was an utter wanker anyway and be glad to be rid of him.

pompodd Wed 19-Nov-14 12:38:08

Speaking as a man, this sort of thing is often, I think, why some men say that they "don't understand" women. I'm sure some women say that about men too, of course.

Completely bonkers text to send (and his reply makes him sounds bonkers too).

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