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How I do I see the light and move on??

(5 Posts)
Blahdeblah111 Wed 19-Nov-14 06:44:05

There has probably been a million threads on here about this, but here goes... DP and I separated in Aug after 6 years, we had became more like friends and wanted time apart. The idea was we would see how we feel etc.

ExDP text me the other day to say there is no way we will get back together now, his feelings have changed too much, he's realised how bad things had gotten.. It hit me really hard. We live 200+ miles away from my family! I have very few friends round here, more acquaintances from work I suppose. My best friend is moving away soon.

I think I'm going to be really lonely but can't move yet because of my job, I'm here for at least another 12 months. I guess I want reassurance that the world is still turning and what I can do to move past it. I can't believe that after 6 years that is it.

Redtartanshoes Wed 19-Nov-14 06:54:38

You will get over him. Infact you are probably doing a pretty good job already.

Fwiw it was a twatty thing for him to do to text you telling you he's over you... It's childish and nasty and actually probably means he isnt over you. Once you are over someone you rarely think about them... You certainly don't go to the hassle of texting to tell them shock

Do you have children together? If not then just try your best to forget about him,keep him out of your head space.

Fill your time with other things.
Websites like are great for meeting people with similar interests to you, whether it be walking/cinema/reading or food. Fill your life with other things, make new friendships, start dating again if you feel ready?

Redtartanshoes Wed 19-Nov-14 06:56:10

Oh and keep a list in your phone or diary of all the horrible things he did while you were together, and each time you think about him or are tempted to contact him read it. It's easy to look back at relationships through rose tinted glasses

CogitoErgoSometimes Wed 19-Nov-14 08:50:57

Sorry you're having this experience. It sounds very upsetting. It also sounds as though the 'time apart to think' idea was more his than yours?

The world does keep turning.... but you do need friends, family and things to keep you occupied. You may have to settle for them being on the end of a phone line or Skype call rather than in person for now, but it's important to keep those connections.

Good luck

Blahdeblah111 Wed 19-Nov-14 19:07:45

Thanks smile the time apart was more me than him.. But to be honest I never thought he'd be the one to decide that it was over. We have no dc... But we had been trying for 12 months, I think that took it's toll on our relationship.

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