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Would you be happy for your sister and your husband to share a bed?

(148 Posts)
jumpinchillybean Mon 17-Nov-14 20:05:14

I'm 7 months pregnant and my husband's snoring has been getting on my nerves. I also get restless and am a light sleeper because of heartburn. So, halfway through the night, I sometimes ask him to sleep on the settee .
That way, we both get some sleep.

My sister has been staying with us for a while because her flat was recently flooded, and I have just found out that she has taken pity on him and has let him into her bed on at least two occasions over the last month!
The only reason I found out, was I went down for a glass of milk a few nights ago and he was no longer on the settee.
I heard laughing and found them in bed together.
They weren't doing anything and weren't even led close to each other.
There was no jumping apart when they saw me. Or guilt that I could see.
The spare bed is a Kingsize, so there was plenty of space between them.

It seemed to be on the level, and I was so tired, I went straight back to bed and decided to ask questions in the morning.

The next morning, in the kitchen, I questioned them and according to her and him, all they've done is chat and then fall asleep and I should be okay about it, because she's my sister and I can trust her and she would never do anything to hurt me. And she said she felt sorry that she was a guest and had a bed and yet he had to sleep on the settee.
And in her words: 'She sees him as a brother anyway'. He said he looks upon her as an extra sister.

My friends (and my mother) think I'm crazy to allow this. But, she's my sister and I can trust her. Can't I? hmm

The only thing that makes me slightly uneasy is that she dresses skimpily in front of him and is very flirty. But that is and always has been her nature. She is like it with everybody.
Still, it makes me feel a bit shit, because I feel unattractive and frumpy at the moment as it is. This is making me feel worse.
And if I'm honest, I feel a bit hurt by their attitude. The way he seems to flirts with her and the way she encourages it.
Or am I imagining it?

Is it normal for a sister to treat another sister in this way? is she just being kind in sharing her bed?
Is this being too close?
Am I being paranoid? Or is it all the fault of my hormones.
Should I be okay with it?

SquirrelSwarm Mon 17-Nov-14 20:06:32

no, not OK
should not continue

MrsCampbellBlack Mon 17-Nov-14 20:06:48

No, no and no.

CluelessNewbie1 Mon 17-Nov-14 20:07:23

Wouldn't bother me at all. But I know my sister and I know my husband. I don't know yours so not sure how helpful my response would be!

TeaForTara Mon 17-Nov-14 20:07:42

No way.

TheSpottedZebra Mon 17-Nov-14 20:08:17

I really don't think it's appropriate.
And I'd not be happy with my sister wearing skimpy clothing (in my house), and flirting with my husband either. And nor would I like my husband to flirt wih my sister.

I'd not be ok with it, hormonal or not. And I'd be furious that they crossed boundaries like that.

IndiansInTheLobby Mon 17-Nov-14 20:08:18

No it's weird! Tell them you're not comfortable with it.

ThePinkOcelot Mon 17-Nov-14 20:08:24

Kind or not, I would not like that at all. Put your foot down and put a stop to this!

FelicityGubbins Mon 17-Nov-14 20:08:29

No way I hell would I be in a bed with my sister's husband, no way in hell would my husband survive if he got into bed with my sister, tell them both to get a fucking grip or she is out on her arse and he will be bollockless...

Scottishcrumpets Mon 17-Nov-14 20:08:42

oh my god, no. under no circumstances let this continue. can your sister not stay with your mother? angry

Catzeyess Mon 17-Nov-14 20:08:56

I would not be happy..

Let's put it this way I wouldn't share a bed with my biological brother especially not in skimpy clothes!

It's not even worrying he might do something, it's just odd to me!

Ragwort Mon 17-Nov-14 20:09:08

Absolutely not OK.

Of course you are not being paranoid, at the very least your DS and DH are showing you no respect whatsoever.

ButEmilylovedhim Mon 17-Nov-14 20:09:10

I would most definitely not be ok with it! I'd want to ask her to leave, to be honest. Even if it is all innocent, the flirting is wrong and so disrespectful to you.

okeydonkey Mon 17-Nov-14 20:09:37

No that's too weird and intimate

ScooseIsLoose Mon 17-Nov-14 20:10:35

No way and my sister wouldn't want to share a bed with dh it's just weird why can't sister share with you and dh have the bed?

havemercy Mon 17-Nov-14 20:10:47

Sorry but its not appropriate.

BertieBotts Mon 17-Nov-14 20:11:19

I don't think I would mind but I can't see either of them being comfortable with it TBH. So it seems like an odd situation.

Is that her emphasis or yours in italics? Because it reads very strangely, almost like she's trying to prove something hmm

PuppyMonkey Mon 17-Nov-14 20:11:37

I'm trying to imagine this with me and my sister's DH...

Nope, cant do it. confused

HumblePieMonster Mon 17-Nov-14 20:12:34

Are you crazy? Of course I wouldn't be happy! I'd kick the slaggy mare out of my house in the middle of the night, and the husband to follow.

formerbabe Mon 17-Nov-14 20:12:55

I trust my sister and my dh....therefore I know both of them would never ever share a bed..they'd rather sleep on the floor! It is very strange..sorry op.

SummerSazz Mon 17-Nov-14 20:13:05

My sister would have to put up with dh's snoring and she is infamously intolerant of anything so would never happen.

The laughing and giggling and 'invitation' would set alarm
Bells ringing if I were you.

DorothyBastard Mon 17-Nov-14 20:13:05

No, that is massively not okay. If she's that concerned about him sleeping on the couch why doesn't she offer to swap with him?

scratchandsniff Mon 17-Nov-14 20:13:09

I think it's odd. I'm surprised that either of them think it's appropriate. I wouldn't be happy about it.

Mintberrycrunch Mon 17-Nov-14 20:13:24

Does your sister snore, how about sharing the king size bed with her?

FunkyBoldRibena Mon 17-Nov-14 20:13:33

No. Absolutely not.

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