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Friday night lows

(19 Posts)
Help1234 Fri 14-Nov-14 21:32:01

I work all week and should be glad it's Friday but since splitting from ex and being a SP I find myself feeling really low on a Friday. I'm not ready for another relationship but I feel really lonely sometimes. I have friends and last weekend we had plans so it was fine but this weekend with no plans I'm back to feeling like this. Just wondering if anyone else is feeling the same tonight I suppose? I try to keep busy but I wish I could just feel content by myself.

Dirtybadger Fri 14-Nov-14 21:40:08

Do you have any hobbies? Fortunately I don't live alone, but I am single. I don't see friends every week. Friday nights in summer/when I feel like it, the dog gets a long walk. Friday nights otherwise I do work for my university course. It doesn't sound fun but it's productive and I feel like a saint/generally proud after plugging away learning for a few hours instead of being out on the piss or on a sofa with someone. Maybe you could sign up for a course that runs on a Friday evening? Ideally something you can miss now and again for when you see friends. Dancing? Languages? Another sport? Writing? Book club?
In fact depending on what it is, it doesn't need to run on a Friday evening. Something with a "homework" element would give you something productive and potentially cathartic to do some weekend evenings...

Help1234 Fri 14-Nov-14 21:47:43

Thanks dirtybadger I do have a new hobby but do it once a week on a different night, I have my daughter at home and so find I am limited to what I can do, otherwise I'd like to be able to start a new hobby or go to the gym or something on a Friday night.

CuttedUpPear Fri 14-Nov-14 21:51:35

Also feeling the Friday night low. Regularly.
You're not alone.

HavingAnOffDAy Fri 14-Nov-14 21:55:06

I'm newly single with 2 young DC's and totally understand where you're coming from OP.

Help1234 Fri 14-Nov-14 22:06:11

Thanks both, I don't think it's helps as it gets closer to xmas and it will be my first on my own. Sorry to hear you are both feeling this way too.

ShouldISellTheHouse Fri 14-Nov-14 22:15:11

Yes I totally feel your pain, I'm having a really bad day today. Xmas coming seems to amplify everything, I'll be glad when it's gone. Also in own with 2 young dcs since march this year flowers

HumblePieMonster Fri 14-Nov-14 22:22:51

Saturdays used to get to me. Saturday nights, when everyone else in the world was in a couple and out living their lives.

Crushed2914 Fri 14-Nov-14 22:29:51

Newly single with a newborn. I'm not liking weekends/evenings at all.

Help1234 Fri 14-Nov-14 22:34:45

Sorry to hear you are having a bad day shouldI it has been since February/march for me too. Feel like I'm stuck between not wanting a relationship and being lonely not in one. I want to book a holiday for next year but not sure if I can go just me and dd, keep thinking I will just see happy couples everywhere and it will be depressing.
Humblepie, I agree about sat too, watching TV by yourself on a sat night is lonely (but I try remind myself that I did exactly the same the last few years while in a relationship, I was lonely then too!)

Help1234 Fri 14-Nov-14 22:37:37

Oh crushed that's hard with a newborn too flowers

Help1234 Fri 14-Nov-14 22:39:12

I do find it helps having something to look forward to. Like booking a night out with the girls for next week or the week after even doesn't seem so bad staying in this week then. Just have nothing planned to look forward to ATM

siblingrevelryagain Fri 14-Nov-14 22:41:47

Recently single as a result of DH's affair, three young children and Friday nights alone too.

Today I'm sad but at least they're with me, albeit asleep. It's worse when they stay with Dad.

I wish I could help with words of wisdom but I'm in the same boat and not out the other side of all this. Not sure when I will be to be honest.

Hope things get easier for you, and everyone else in the same situation.

Help1234 Fri 14-Nov-14 22:47:47

Thank you sibling, hope they do for you too flowers

Help1234 Fri 14-Nov-14 22:52:06

I suppose being alone is better than being in the wrong relationship too. For every happy loved up couple on a fri night I'm sure there are lots that are arguing/upset/unhappy too

pippinleaf Fri 14-Nov-14 22:55:55

I felt like this for years after a split with my long term partner. It's horrible. I used to plan at least one meet-up a weekend so I could have something to look forward to and some company. It often meant planning a long way in advance and sometimes forcing myself to do stuff I wasn't in the mood for. My heart goes out to you. Xxthanks

SelfLoathing Fri 14-Nov-14 23:08:42

I think if you are single and of an age when most of your friends are coupled up, your social life becomes different. I've been single for a long time (was an OW until recently which in some ways is single but is even worse than being single).

My social life is now reversed from when I was younger, in that now I go out almost every night of the week but Fri - Sun is my former Sun/Mon/Tues. It's not impossible to go out on a Fri/Sat but it just requires a bit of forward planning as most people in couples are busy at the weekend - often with other couples.

What initially seems very traumatizing quickly becomes normal. The weekend becomes much more "me" time. What is great about it is that you can do what you want. Plan to visit friends who live in cities further away. Go and stay with your parents. Have a weekend city break to Paris. You don't need to do this every weekend - just once in a while when you feel like it. Trips away are especially fun because your married friends will ooh and aah about your glam life and how they wished they could just drop everything and have a weekend in Barcelona when they felt like it.

Something I really love is storing up "bad" (By which I mean guilty pleasure) pre-recorded TV, getting a nice bottle of wine, cooking myself something fabulous and settling in for a Friday night spoiling myself and watching what I want to watch.

Another good thing about being single is that you can really have fun and improve your cooking skills because there is absolutely no "dinner party/guest" pressure. If the grand design doesn't work, no big deal, chuck it in the bin and start again or order a pizza.

There are a lot of really, really good things about being single. Scroll through some of the relationship threads here to see what I mean. Would you rather be where you are right now or dealing with some of the problems people in relationships post about here. No situation is perfect and all have advantages and disadvantages. But, for a woman, being single has a lot of advantages.

avocadogreen Fri 14-Nov-14 23:27:00

Yep, since splitting from exH 8 months ago I get that too... it sucks. Currently on the sofa under a duvet watching Scream 2! Oh the high life...

I have really leaned on friends since ex left, planning visits away etc or inviting people over. Today we had a friend and her kids over for tea- jist a few hours but it's nice to have some adult company. And I've just booked tickets for the kids and I to go and stay with a friend who lives abroad in Feb- quite excited at the thought of the 3 of us catching a plane together and going somewhere new smile

Ledkr Fri 14-Nov-14 23:32:35

I was on my own for years and you have hit the nail on the head when you say it's easier when you have something to look forward to.
For that reason I used to plan ahead all the time. If I couldn't afford a night out then friends came to me or I'd have DVD night with the kids.
It gets easier.

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