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Case of the ex...help before I go insane

(9 Posts)
Mumtobenovember Mon 10-Nov-14 16:40:12

My partner of 4 years and dad of my 6 week old Son speaks to his ex wife ALL the time regardless of how much I protest and how many arguments we have he still does it!! He refuses to compromise on this as she is his "freind" now I'm ok with him having female friends but this woman is a joke, she tries to wind me up putting her fb photo as her and him, asking him to give her lifts places etc.. He does not see how vindictive she is! I've spoken to her myself on occasion where I've lost my temper and she is so patronising and sly I can't take it.. She has a kid of her own with someone else think her and the dad have split. She seems to have stepped up her game since I had my son WHAT DO I DO? Anyone else had ex issues?!!

chdmum2491 Mon 10-Nov-14 16:56:00

tell her to back the fuck off as ive said on previous posts like this no doubt youll get lots of posters saying how your husband should be sticking up for you and telling her to stop winding you up and so on smile she sounds like a right knobhead -.-

Mumtobenovember Mon 10-Nov-14 16:57:27

She's vile she thinks she's the cats tits- she thrives off pissing me off!

He thinks I'm just being a jealous nutter as he sees no issue with there friendship!!

chdmum2491 Mon 10-Nov-14 17:21:48

lmfao the cats-tits ! i hate women like that luckily my dp's exs all hate him grin id be the same as you otherwise smile

Boomeranggirl Mon 10-Nov-14 17:25:49

She is taking the piss! They are having an emotional affair that needs to stop now. It would appear he is using her as a back up plan and she is trying to undermine you. It is disrespectful to you and your child. I think you are going to need to put your foot down on this one and make it clear it's not acceptable.

This is what I would do in your shoes:

Once baby is in bed sit down with your DH and tell him he is being disrespectful. You want him to stop acting this way and break off contact. You are his partner and worthy of respect, this woman is not respectful towards his family (you and baby ) and he should not tolerate that.

You will not stand for it and will take action if necessary.

If he doesn't take you seriously I would suggest you ask him whether he would be happy as a weekend dad as that's where he is heading.

He is a father now with responsibilities. Time to grow up.

Stand firm. If he calls you a nutter then tell him very calmly you won't get drawn into playing mind games by questioning your own judgement. You are in the right, end of. Take it or leave it.

Remind him she is his ex for a reason!

Respect is what is missing here. He needs to know you have standards and won't lower yourself into fighting with another woman over him.

Don't speak to ex. That will add fuel to her fire. Don't FGS look on Facebook then she won't get a reaction. Sound like she thrives on drama, don't give her oxygen.

Stand up to him and let him know you mean it. But be warned it may not go how you want, just be mindful of that. At least then you've got your answer.

Good luck.

magoria Mon 10-Nov-14 17:26:07

Only thing you can do is decide to put up and shut up to stay with him or to leave him and move on.

He has made it clear having her in his life is a higher priority than your happiness and relationship.

Mumtobenovember Tue 11-Nov-14 17:54:32

Might have to start kicking up a stink

SolidGoldBrass Tue 11-Nov-14 18:03:27

Does he have any children with her? If he does, then amicable contact between him and her is actually necessary and good.
|Even if they don't have children, if they were together for a long time then it is not, actually, unreasonable for them to be friends. You sound quite childish and spiteful, and you should bear in mind that foot-stamping jealous tantrums are actually repellent to most partners.

nozzz Tue 11-Nov-14 18:45:31

Could you explain more the 'vindictiveness' involved?

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