I don't know what I'm asking here, I just need to talk. My rl friends would go apeshit with me if I said what I'm about to say.
About 8 years ago, a 6 year relationship came to an end. I loved this guy like I'd never loved anyone. It was by my own admission, deeply unhealthy in terms if the hurt it caused me throughout, however I do believe he was a good man and our relationship was doomed only by circumstance.
When it ended I was utterly broken, to the extent I was physically unwell. I tried to put him out of my mind and even married, but have always known that I have never met anyone, including my husband, who I loved like I loved him.
It took at least four years before he stopped bring in my thoughts daily. My marriage failed in this time. I've moved on. Until I bumped into him today. It felt like I'd gone back in term 8 years. We barely spoke due to the circumstances of our meeting (him at work) but I felt like I'd been punched in the face. I still love him. I realise now he probably will be the love of my life. I can't imagine feeling about anyone the way I did about him. I feel sick, I can't get him out of my mind. I could easily be in touch with him...but it would be lethal.
I'm so, so sad tonight
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
Oh god....all over the place :(
chestnut100 · 09/11/2014 21:01
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