What would your DH do if you were awarded a First Class Degree?

[actionsspeaklouder]

Exactly that really. I'm new here, but long time lurker.

I have worked really hard for this degree(OU) over 4 years, PT work and looking after 2 children with little help/support from DP who has a very 'busy' job. I'm so proud of myself.

Him, not even a card. He has said 'Well done'. But that's it. He didn't even want to help me revise for my last exam - he was too tired. That really upset me.

So, what would your DHs say/do? Do I need to get a grip?

[whattheseithakasmean]

My DH would be so proud & would boast about me to everyone (embarrassingly).

Effeminately flowers, chocs & card from him & the DDS as a minimum - probably meal out & champagne.

Your DH needs to get a grip - tell him how his lack of enthusiasm is making you feel.

[whattheseithakasmean]

Definitely, not effeminately - my DH isn't the least bit effeminate!

[mumof6needssanity]

That's brilliant congratulations.

I would be very disappointed if my dh acted like yours tbh. But I'm not sure how he would react I would hope he would make a fuss of me all little bit.

Sorry I'm not much help.

[FunkyBoldRibena]

Probably go out for a meal.

I'm on my fourth degree and will expect a 'well done' and a meal out somewhere.

[molesbreath]

I think that's really poor on his part.

well done you - fantastic achievement !

[PingPongBat]

Congratulations!

Not entirely sure what DH would do, I don't think he'd actively suggest a celebration of some sort, but if I suggested a meal or something similar he'd take me out somewhere special.

[InfinitySeven]

DP got a first class degree.

I bought him an engraved watch with the date on, and a card. We went for a meal with his parents, and had a lot of photos taken. We had lots of champagne!

I also had his certificate framed and it's up in the study. I comment on it occasionally and it makes him smile.

Tell your DH to pull his socks up...this is worthy of some effort!

[FaFoutis]

My Dh sent me a card, inside he wrote "now you can crow all day".
I wasn't crowing in the least, I think it was because he got a third.


You have done something amazing there OP, congratulations.

[Theorientcalf]

My DH would be really proud and I expect we would celebrate.

You don't need to get a grip, your DH needs to buck up his ideas big time.

[hollie84]

DP congratulated me but he didn't get me a card or anything! I didn't expect one though.

[Theorientcalf]

Actually it wouldn't matter what degree I got, first or otherwise, he'd still be proud.

[Jan45]

Well done you, shame your partner is as thick as mince. Sounds like he's never much had your back, maybe the catalyst for you to change the situation!

[Augustwedding]

When DH gets his masters I'm going organise a big family meal followed by a nice hotel! Neither of us can wait till he finishes!

[MisguidedAngel]

I got a 2:1 and my (then) DH said "of course a 2:1 in Psychology isn't really that impressive". My self-esteem had been so low I was amazed to even pass.

[Jellibelli]

I am currently in my second year of my second degree (am old) and am studying around work. When I got my first year results, dh took me straight out for a giant ice cream to celebrate. He was proud and mentioned it whenever he could to anyone. DCs were a bit bored of it by the end of dinner that night .

It's not you it's him I'm afraid. Well done and congratulations!

[StrangeGlue]

With any big achievement he'd suggest a meal out, ask if I wanted to choose something to commemorate and probably get me flowers or something.

Sorry I feel like I'm pouring salt in a wound :(

[munchkin2902]

Congratulations, that's brilliant. If it's any consolation I don't think my OH would do much more than say well done either. There definitely wouldn't be any presents (I say this after years of exams and some good work promotions.)

[Twinklestein]

I've got one as it goes but I didn't know my husband then.

If I got another one he'd be stoked.

[LadyLuck10]

Congrats op! That must have been incredibly hard but you've done it. My DH would be telling everyone we know and then some, probably a celebration out and a nice little present. I think your DH is being very unsupportive and actually not a good husband if he couldn't even think to get you a card which would also be very sweet.

[AugustaGloop]

Well I would not get a card because DH never ever buys cards, even for birthdays. Nor would I get flowers, because he never gets me flowers(maybe once or twice in 20 years).
But I am pretty sure I would get a bottle of champagne and a meal out. And he would be so proud (well, I did get a first and he is very proud of that but I did not know him at the time!).

[Gen35]

He'd be really proud of me and say lots of nice things - not sure itd occur to buy a present but maybe some wine and we'd definitely celebrate - I agree, tell your DH how you feel but don't let his reaction ruin your HUGE achievement!

[wallaby73]

Something suggests to me he feels vaguely threatened.....inadequate...and so he should! Can't even bring himself to give more than a "well done"? Wonder what he'd expect if roles reversed? Congratulations from me - doing any kind of study, whilst being a parent, is humbling in my opinion

[WorraLiberty]

He'd give me a huge kiss and a cuddle and then annoy me by telling everyone we know, how proud he is

[actionsspeaklouder]

Thanks for all your replies.

Jan45 - you are right, that is exactly how I feel - that he has never much had my back.

I know I shouldn't drip feed (funny how this - pretty insignificant- was the first thing that I felt I wanted to post about) but this has come after a long and slow realisation of just how unsupportive he has been to me in the past. We have even been to Relate (waste of time).

Actually things have been really bad (yet I still passed!) but we are trying to work on our relationship. So, from my point of view, even more reason for him to show his pride in me.

He does know I am disappointed in his response, but I wasn't sure if I was over-reacting because of our recent history, or because he has indeed proved himself to be an unthinking dick (again)