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I was really hoping you were all wrong

(19 Posts)
noexcuseiammental Tue 02-Sep-14 02:51:50

I have another thread on this, but just to recaep, I found my OH on a site, he claimed that he had nothing to do with it blah, blah, blah. Because I couldn't prove it one way or the other I gave him the benefit of the doubt. He is away this evening with "work", so I have logged onto his computer and checked the history. Fuck the whole nothing to do with it claim, but what angers me more than anything is he gave me a lie in (i thought he was being nice) he was on porn sites, my son would of been in the room with him.

I really cannot start to tell you what is on my fucking mind. What sort of a father looks at porn while their two year old is in the same room.

I might (a big might) have gotten over the web sites (these are not porn websites, which I probably wouldn't of given two shites about, these are meeting up websites for sex) but he has been looking at these sites along with proper pron two guys shagging one woman sites, infront of my fucking son. (I might still be fuming) I am not sure why I am posting, because I have ended the relationship but it doesn't stop me from being sad and angry

BitOutOfPractice Tue 02-Sep-14 04:09:20

Of course it doesn't. You have every right to be absolutely fucking livid with this twat.

Have you got any RL support?

kaykayblue Tue 02-Sep-14 08:12:54

So are you going to throw him to the kerb?

You should take screen shots of the internet history. Isn't this sort of thing pretty much neglect? Or something?

And for the love of god don't let him try and "convince" you that you are somehow wrong.


Theoldhag Tue 02-Sep-14 08:25:11

Has he have any redeeming qualities?

Theoldhag Tue 02-Sep-14 08:25:48

*Does not has.

AMessageToYouRudie Tue 02-Sep-14 08:28:48

just wanted to say well done on being so strong, you feel sad now but I hope you will have good things come your way soon. My best friends "darling [arse] partner used dating sites and porn while watching their son, had an affair and then left her.... but fast forward a year she has met a man who adores her, adores and respects her son, she really has turned her life around and he is lovely, so hang on in there, your turn next, big hug for you though matie....

BaronessBomburst Tue 02-Sep-14 08:29:58

If it puts your mind at rest regarding your son, I doubt very much that he would have seen the porn. Far more likely that he'd plonked him in front of cBeebies.

Bluestocking Tue 02-Sep-14 08:31:32

I'm pretty sure exposing children to sexually explicit material would be a CP matter and this would therefore have a bearing on his contact with your DS after you split.

Lucylloyd13 Tue 02-Sep-14 08:45:34

How have things been apart from this? A first child can put pressure on a relationship.

noexcuseiammental Tue 02-Sep-14 08:46:43

Thank you for your replies.

I agree my son would of been far more interested in cbeebies than what daddy was doing.

No I don't have any RL support. I am just going to get through today and then will deal with tomorrow.

The relationship is over as far as I am concerned and what he does now is none of my business

Vivacia Tue 02-Sep-14 08:59:44

Have you spoken to him?

HumblePieMonster Tue 02-Sep-14 09:02:37

Reasonable concern for your son's welfare, plus a bit of displacement - that anger is partly your anger at your OH's betrayal.
Well done on the fury, it will carry you through the 'getting rid' phase.

AnyFucker Tue 02-Sep-14 09:09:53

Good for you. Nice to see a woman on here with boundaries that are non negotiable.

"A first child puts strain on a relationship" ?

What a pile of apologist shite.

AliceDoesntLiveHereAnymore Tue 02-Sep-14 09:36:22

How have things been apart from this? A first child can put pressure on a relationship.

Actually, having the partner that's an utter wankbadger can put pressure on a relationship. Thankfully, the OP has fixed that problem by LTB.

Well done on that, OP.

BitOutOfPractice Tue 02-Sep-14 11:27:47

Lucy are you really asking that? How have things been apart from him being a lying scumbag?

noexcuseiammental Tue 02-Sep-14 14:42:32

TBF to my ex, he was a very good partner up till this point and a brilliant father.

However I don't feel the fact that he was a good partner (or I just didn't catch him before) allows him to do the dirty on me.

noexcuseiammental Tue 02-Sep-14 14:45:10

And yes I sent him some texts ending it last night and this morning he has messaged me back he informed me that he didn't want to do it over text and to get off his fucking computer.

Not sure what he wants to discuss unless it is our son

hellsbellsmelons Tue 02-Sep-14 14:48:18

Ohhh what a charmer he is.
So sorry it's not turned out well.

FrootLoopy Tue 02-Sep-14 14:51:02

Fucking computer? How very apt. But the point of the matter is that computers shouldn't actually BE for fucking, should they?!

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