Was on a date last night with a man I've been seeing for a couple of months. Everything fine so far, but there was something that bothered me.
We were having a goodnight kiss and some (drunken) guy shouted "get a room" (how original). I laughed it off, but it made my date irrationally angry. He started swearing about how "people should mind their own fucking business" etc etc, and was advancing towards the guy who said it- had I not dragged him away there's a chance it would have got nasty. Minutes later he said "people like that need a punch".
I told him not to be so ridiculous and that the guy wasn't worth a reaction. However, after seeing this side of him, it's got me a bit worried. Apart from that he is lovely, it has really shocked me. He hadn't even had that much to drink (though that wouldn't have been an excuse).
Is it normal for some men to get on like this or should I run a mile?
No that's not normal. It's a snap shot of what is to come.
I once went on an internet date. He was argumentative before we'd even ordered drinks. He was talking about what a horrible person his mother was and getting angry about it. Red flag I did not heed because he was massive and fit...
Two weeks later I could add.... Embarrassing controlling behaviour in front of my friends. Shouting at me. Asking if I had an eating disorder because I did not want to come for dinner as was seeing my friend. Crawling across the floor after the shouting, saying 'Look!!! My body is lower than yours - not aggressive, not aggressive. Please don't leave!!!'
Run. I waited til I'd been thrown across a room but the red flags had been there had I wanted to see them. He's just shown you he thinks he's completely justified in acting aggressively in public. What do you think he'd be like behind closed doors?
You've been seeing him for a couple months.. now (as another poster has stated) the mask is slipping. He's either feeling more comfortable showing you the "real" him or he cannot maintain the "nice guy" persona.
When I met STBXP he had a strop on date 1 because a male friend text to see if I was free for a coffee the following day. I looked at my text because he said, " oooh that'll be a friend checking to see if you're okay"
Date 2 he accused me of still being active in a dating site, cue my frantic denial and a further sulk
...fwiw I have no bloody idea why I didn't run for the hills at this point...
A very considerable time later I left with my self worth in absolute tatters. His behaviour may be a one off but it has made you question it and very often it us our gut we should listen to rather than the apologies, excuses blah blah blah that come after the event.